Fear of being judged: how MINIMALISM can help

It's so cold out there
But your such a warm person
Yk, people with cold hands have warm hearts

It took me a life journey to realize that they are threatened by you, and very small, so maybe an annoyance but laughable when you see them as minions! Greeting from Northern 🇨🇦, currently -27

I've had experience with others whose opinions came from a troubled mindset. It can sting for a bit. And blocking them is the way to go so that their comments don't detract from everyone else's experience.
I rationalize that the person was a triggered traumatized individual without judgment - I do this to be kind and to help me let it go.
I notice my feelings change from one moment to the next.

I inhale slowly and deeply and exhale completely, longer than the inhale...several times to relax.
As my breath slows back down, I visualize myself as a sheep herder on a hilltop, gazing into space while the flock is spread out down the hillside, appearing dimly in my peripheral vision.
I notice the space between myself and the sheep gradually becoming vaster until they seem very distant.
The sheep are my emotional or physical pain and any thoughts or memories that appear. I simply let them all go as they come.

I just sit like that for 20-30 minutes as my breath settles down.
I do this once every morning and once every evening and whenever else it is needed.

Ana, your beautiful soul shines in your videos........thank you for sharing us the positive vibes and life experience...

Dearest Ana(stasia) 💕 Thank you for 'thinking' ... I appreciate very much the way you process your thoughts ... this is helping me look at my thoughts :) Thank you for sharing your life with us ... it is helping me realize we truly are in 'this' together and if we don't share, we do feel alone and somehow 'different' or 'bad' for our thoughts and feelings. As my late husband shared with me, 'that person you see has a story ... don't judge ...' -- the more we share our stories, maybe then, the understanding that comes allows them to dissolve :) thanking you again for your helpful sharing ... I am 73 in Canada ... 3 years into beginning a new life, suddenly ... the window of opportunity opened in the universe and I jumped in to not miss it -- I had no idea what would come of it, I just knew I had to take it ... YaY !! love from here 💕

You have so much insight and are an excellent communicator.
It is a truely a pleasure to listen to you speak. You are very kind and thoughful person. I know different people but they are mostly only acquaintances and not good friends. I have very few close friends and was deeply saddened when a close friend passed away unexpectedly in April 2020. Nothing bad about the people I know who are not good friends, but just don't feel a certain bond with them to call them or think of them as a close friend. You have like a heart of a poet, who has so much wisdom and can feel empathy and understanding. You are the kind of person I would want as a friend, not just not an acquaintance. ( and I'm not even a minimalist- quite the opposite actually. 😊)..
From USA.

Hi Anna, thank you for this story. It has helped me so much.

People should be concerned about the log in their eye not the splinter in someone else’s. Be the best you want to be and don’t let negativity find it’s way into your soul.

Turning a blind eye and a deaf ear is universal. I am from Missouri USA and that's how it was in my childhood. But that was how my parents were raised. I am a Grandmother and I still struggle with the opinions of others sometimes.

Thank you for your channel which I have only just discovered. It is like a breath of fresh air and you speak so eloquently. I look forward to catching up with the other videos on your channel.

Hi, Anna. This episode is great, like all others. Would you be able to expand on it and talk about the peer pressure in Moscow, within your generation, and how you dealt with it? People's expectations, etc.? Thank you. :)

How could you possibly get a hater 😱 you seem so nice - hi 👋 from Ireland 🇮🇪 🍀

Nice people are nice to everyone. If they are unkind consistently, they are not nice people. When they say mean things, they are saying a lot about themselves, but nothing about you. The reason it hurts is that YOU are a nice, kind person.

Its always like that. One "cancer" starts hurting another person in attempt to ease his grief and whoever he hurts starts dishing out pain to others. So often too people project their own failures onto others. At a certain age it becomes very visible because you've seen the pattern so many times already. Then it gets a bit easier because at least you can understand why and that the accuser is a real problem. Haters are very hard on younger people though as they lack the experience to figure out its the bully and troll who really has a problem.
Keep up good work, ignore the trolls 💖

As a Canadian, I was raised to be sorry for all things, including being myself. I was even sorry for being raped as a child, and I had to work really hard on myself as an adult to acknowledge my uniqueness. It's not something that's celebrated really around here. Conformism is what's encouraged. My mom would say " why can't you be like others?" I grew up as a very sensitive girl and was told by my parents that it was " a weapon against myself" to be like that, that I had to be different. That life would crush me. I know they meant well. Today though, I remain sensitive but there are positive sides to it, such as empathy that comes easier. I wish I was brave enough to share my views, as you, but, I know the hate comments would keep me from sleeping at night. I feel invalidated too quickly when criticized. You are one very inspiring person. Thank you for sharing so generously your wisdom and take on life. It matters. Question: Do you feel that the haters are perhaps just faced with their own flaws while watching your videos and get annoyed because of it?

Fantastic …. Just what I need to hear today xx big hugs, love and brightest blessings 🤗🐶💜👏💐🇬🇧

Having watched several of your videos, I just wanted to say how much I love your sharing. Your realizations of how to best function (and indeed thrive) in this world despite the many obstacles you have faced, are inspirational. I also appreciate your commitment to a vegan way of life while maintaining a non-judgmental attitude towards those who are not on this particular path.

I love what you’re doing thank you for all the efforts you put into your content, these are invaluable vessels of insight …Finding your channel was a sweet serendipity. You are authentic and have the most wonderful way of looking at the world , lots of love from Cyprus 🌸⭐️🌸

Please try to ignore them. They are lost and clueless. It's best not to feed them by responding. I'm so glad you're here. ♥️♥️♥️

You are so precious person. Worm heart from Siberia ❤🙂

Hi Anna, I can absolutely relate. I’m originally from Hungary. Growing up the late 80’s and early 90’s experienced the same issues around me. I love your videos because sometimes I hear my deepest thoughts by you. Your videos are awesome. Thank you 🙏🏻

When someone is rude, it’s not about the target, it’s more about them. So happy you’re able to rise above it! You’re an intelligent person.

I fall back on~ Sticks and stones may break your bones but, names will never hurt you!

The story about the offical who didn't like their profile was a great anecdote. You drew a good pararel between the personal insecurities and how they result in hurting others, often unknowingly

My Dad always said “Things only bother you as much as you let it.” Fits well with what you have said.

Visualize letting the negativity pass through you. 😘

so glad i found your channel, Ana! your opinions are very pertinent , considerate and expressed with much gentleness - a rare thing nowadays on the internet. Thank you for the bits of wisdom and beauty !

You are one of the very few people I trust. Your presentations (conversations?) touch my soul, and are gently changing my life (and my soul) for the better. Thank you…

It's such a balance - natural feelings to wanting to be liked yet it can be so subjective. Thank you for being so open and sharing your thoughts!

A friend shared your channel with me, and I’m so glad she did. I find your videos very inspiring. Kudos to you for reaction to the troll!

As a person in my 60's, I can assure you that caring about what others think about oneself becomes less important as you age. There will always be people who won't agree with you or even like you, but that is life and life is short. Embrace your friends/family and forget about the trolls.

Great background on this video. The colors of the wall and your wardrobe goes very well.

You are such a gift to our world. I love to listen to you while I’m in my art room. And I’m constantly nodding my head in agreement with your thoughts and often “talk” to you :) I’m learning to speak kindly to myself. The better I care for myself the less important other people’s actions and opinions matter to me. In this post, I want to thank you for talking about alcohol/drug abuse in your family. I come from a long history of women that lived harsh, short, addicted lives. I’ve been sober for two years and I am empowered knowing I’m breaking a cycle and showing our son we can learn from family mistakes and do better.

What would you consider someone breaking your privacy border

I love your channel Greetings from London x

another great video Ana. the bonus of your collages was fantastic! i would love to buy one- i don't have a lot of money but do you ever sell your collages, or make very small ones? as one sensitive artist to another I hope that doesn't feel like pressure. but i think your voice is an important one and provides connection to all of us who relate very much to the wisdom you have to offer. having a little piece of your art someday would be lovely! best wishes from the US.

Thank you for this video. It meant so much to me to listen to your thoughts. You have such a beautiful soul and I wish you all the love and happiness in the world. Thank you for this video.

❤️❤️❤️❤️

❤️🌺

I ignore the haters, for hate destroys the haters. Smile and drive them crazy! lo Never argue with a fool, or two fools are arguing.

Dear Ana(stasia), it takes a lot of courage to share your experience with us. Every video you post I find highly inspirational and like a little retreat from the everyday routine and chaos that sometimes occurs. It is like talking to a friend. Thank you for letting us see your corner of the world, and the way you think ❤️ Keep up the good work, it is very appreciated 🙂

I use to be very affected by negative opinions or rude people or critisism/ judgments on my person or my actions/opinions/crafts/my style etc. They use to affect me so much, that they completely took over, taking charge and leaving me like a victim.
One day, about 20 years ago; dear friend and teacher at our local High School told me, that it was perfectly o.k., to leave a "room", when people crossed borders and became offending. This stuck with me forever and launched a completely new way of handling these situations for me. I saw parallels to the teachings of the Bible, which says "love thy enemy". I studied and became interested in Buddhism and all kinds of teachings for example by Laotse or New Age teachers like Neville Goddard. I started to take up Aikido, a peaceful martial art, in where you take the attackers energy and redirect it away from yourself. These are all the same priciples. Love thy enemy, leaving the "room", redirecting energy.... it is all the same thing. The "dark energies" will allways be there and when it happens, it will be up to ourselves, how we react to them, or if we react at all. I try to think of it as a spiritual practice, kind of like going to a spiritual gym, training my spiritual muscles, lol. If you let yourself be taken down by bad energies, they will take over. They are strong and if you are not guarded, they can take you by surprise. At the beginning of my spiritual journey, old behaviour patterns let me "react" to bad situations without thinking, like an autopilot I would response. But nowadays I have some tools at hand, some mental ones, to help me out.
I start to breathe consciously and count until 10, before I react, for example. Or I "buy" myself time and let the other person know, that I will think or sleep upon it before I react. It allways depends on the situation you are in. If somebody is just plain hurtful and crosses borders, it is best to leave the situation for good, also meaning to block someone, as an emergency reaction. One has to protect oneself first. That is vital and it is an important messure in living "self love". That is another issue, we women have often. We try to please everybody, were brought up this way often and take more bs from others than we ever should. Women especially have to learn to set boundaries and learn self love. Remeber: If there is someone who attacs you, one can only guess the reasons behind it. Sometimes we will never know why. But the most importnt thing is, that we do not take it personal and see it just as a practice for our spiritual muscles, for a test on how we will react or handle the situation. It is almost like an execise God sends us, to see how far the pupil got on his or her journey. And the more we learn and accomplish, the harder the lessons get sometimes. ;-) But God knows, we are no beginners anymore, but advanced. So, it is like getting a black belt in martial arts, lol.
Blessings from Germany.

Such a tough topic. It is very hard to be human. We must ignore those opinions that hurt us, but are we shutting out constructive criticism? We must be gentle on others, but then do they know the real us? Communication is fraught with missteps. Comments from others don’t actually hurt us; we are the ones who apply meaning that we find painful. If I attack you fir your pale skin and you have beautiful black skin, you are not hurt because you wonder if my eyes are bad. But if you are 6 feet tall and I attack you as too tall, you remember being teased as a child or turned down fir a date by a shorter person, and now you feel pain. It is always about meaning we give to the comment. And although they may intend to cause hurt, does that mean they are bad? Almost everyone is looking for a way to feel better in the moment. Perhaps it gives this person a moment of glee to cause pain. So it isn’t really about you; you are just a useful object, like a cigarette, to ease their burden. What we call communication is an inside job; we see ourselves in others. That is what we are looking for all the time. I am seeing myself in you. If I hate, I am a hurting, angry person trying to create myself in you. If we can only live ourselves, the world would be peaceful and joyful. If we can look at a hate filled comment and think ‘wow! That’s interesting’ then we are progressing on self-love. Those are my thoughts and not meant to imply I live up to them. But I’m trying.

Just be yourself 🌷☘️👌

you help me so much.

I love your videos.

God can help 😊

Your aura is so refreshing, I love listening to your voice, it's so soothing and your profiency in English is absolutely amazing. Keep it up.

I became aware at a very young age 14 that I did not care what anyone thought about me except my mom. I considered this a gift . I don’t know where this self awareness came from but I have it and it is a super power. When I have been insulted in a text I block the person .if it is to my face I say , nothing you say moves me and I walk away. I’m always amazed at the lengths people will go to get a reaction from me but it never works I won’t engage them and I’m totally indifferent to what ever vile thing comes out of their mouth

Hi Ana thank you so much for your channel this video is helping me today I come from a family who was very dependent on alcohol both my parents plus all relatives on both sides of their family it’s pretty much all I remember from childhood and growing up I’m thankful to god I have not had this issue as my 3 brothers also have addiction issues I feel like I’ve never had a family because of this issue my mother god rest her soul also suffered depression and would leave the family home for 6 weeks at a time while I was still a teenager I was then made to take care of the family home cook clean etc this meant no schooling for me the list goes on I could write a book, thank my friend I appreciate your channel