What is true no contact?: how to kill the hope

Every time I want to see what’s going on with her and what’s she’s up to I come and watch this video
She doesn’t want me in her life,and I’m trying to rip the bandaid off even tho my heart still wants her
But at least I’m conscious of what I need to do,it hurts a lot tho

Totalmente de acuerdo! Gracias !

Thank you for this video! I wish I'd found it over a year ago! I just commented on another of your videos, about letting go of someone by allowing yourself to keep loving them, so you can let them go and stop clinging with resentment about the break-up. You just gave me the formula to end two wretched years of limerence with a married man. My only peace of mind has been that I've stayed entirely away from him, never done anything I'd always regret. But now, your advice and my instincts tell me I'm about to get free, because I'm going to use this advice, to the letter. All I have to do is come up with a replacement image/character in my mind. I'm a visual artist; it shouldn't be a tough task. Thank you so much!

Hope is the bird that sings while the dawn is still dark.

It's must easier once the bitterness sets in. 😊

Hope is killing me. I hope i can kill it because hope is killing me now. No contact isnt working for me its only playing a game and not being true to your feelings
I cant heal like that only making me more depressed that he is not reaching out to me.

So, this is something oposite of a bluff.

So difficult to do that today. Specially since everyone and everthing is on the internet.

I am not sure that it is actually possible to deliberatetly not to think about some particular thing. For instance, try not to think about a big red rabbit. As you read these lines, you probably ended up thinking about a big red rabbit. I beleive that in the case of emotions, the passive act can be more effective. You should treat your emotions as if they were clouds on the sky. There is nothing you can do about them but why should you? The clouds are just there. You just notice them, maybe identify them, and then you move on. You just keep moving on.

One useful thing I have come across together rid off/ kill the internal imagery and any longing towards coming back to my "EXES" (Crushes) comes partially from Theoretical Physics. In parts of String Theory others more Science Fiction (Yes! Nerd talk) Goes something such as this Train of thought

Since there are multiple possibilities of outcomes in the universe, our multiple universes. There might be ONE or several realities OR possibilities that you never EVER met them at all. I switch my belief system to those "Realities". The more you train you mind and also your body towards that, the easiest and fastest you can detach from any lingering thoughts, feelings etc. from YZ Persons

Spot on

Energetic cord cutting to all energies is key. Light language on you tube. It'll change your life to help cut attachment ties. 🧿

Makes sense.... yet I’m not ready to let go of the hope completely - at least not yet

They keep popping into my dreams and asking to get back together. In my dreams I'm strong enough to say no, but when I'm awake I'm not so sure I could.

💯 resonated ❤. I needed to hear this 🙏

If only it was that simple and easy lol "yeah bro just go no contact and kill any hope and you good"

Excellent how well you put it into words! Love your work. Thank you very much indeed.

Thank you so much much needed video 😢

watching a lot of videos like this to move on. Seriously it was so hard to move on with someone especially if he’s your first bf and it even lasted for 4 years. He promise not to leave me but in the end he left just because he’s afraid to get married. If only I could erase him to my memory I did. He’s not even changing the status on social media that we still together and didn’t delete our pictures. I need to survive and kill this hope

Do you really think hope is the equivalent of hanging onto pain? Even if you do, I find it rather bold to assume that thinking of or having hope — more like expectation, really — of ex is painful!

I think it’s like the death of a beloved parent. One can revel in warm memories, have deep appreciation for lessons learned, feel genuine compassion for, and have deep respect for certain qualities. With such a happy heart as one thinks of an ex, where is all the pain? Yes, the person is gone, but thinking about him or her, missing him or her, is not necessarily pathological or keeping one stuck.

As far as the expectation the ex will return, that’s more of a given, an eventuality, than clinging to a beggar’s plea. For me, I just expect it. Not even sure if it’s the best thing for me, but seems to be what will happen.

My whole point is it’s certainly not painful. I’m rather enjoying this time apart more than not.

FYI. What I do hope is that this helps you realize everyone who sees this isn’t who you think.

Its worked for me. With a terrible side effect.
I've lost something of myself,

I despise hope.

Just one thing though, yrs ago you met somone got engaged and got married so all this messing around and men not being able to commit properly these days gets very boring very quickly.

I have never had an ex come back, never, not once, learned that 'no hope' lesson a very long time ago. One said she would come back, but I think she just said that to make herself feel better. I waited for her for many years, she never returned. I have learned that it is best to not love anyone, to not care about anyone. Everyone will betray you and abandon you without exception, hope is an equal waste as love. There is no hope and there is no love, just evil people to devour your soul.

We need this kind of content

what if kids are involved

How about NoFap?

I opened a fortune cookie that said this: "Suppose you get exactly what you desire. Now what?". From this I realized even if my ex did come to see things my way she wouldn't magically be a different person. My ex thinks I'm mentally ill even though she knows how to toy with a man's emotions and feelings. If the woman you love hates you and can't see any good in you then it is time to let hope die and give up loving that woman.

I believe that, although as mammals, we are emotional. We feel attachment and so on. Of the two sexes, males are not yet adapted to the feeling of falling in love. The pain of losing the person who is the object of his love is so enormous that it often affects him for years. There are many women who suffer for love, but on average they tend to recover sooner and continue. A man may spend two years trying to forget, and believe that he suffers just as she did, when, although he may have suffered similarly for a few weeks, he soon finds himself in a new relationship. Without thinking at any time about the past experiences with the previous partner. Emotional markers wreak havoc on men... making them vulnerable and weak. Not to mention that a vulnerable man does not attract even her shadow, something that a woman can afford to show. Falling in love, for a man, is completely maladaptive for his survival.

Whenever I think of the guy who dumped me I will from now on think of a turd. I will associate him with a stinking turd.

I wouldn't take them back, but there is a part of me holding on. I really really need this to DIE.
Thank you

Many thing

I’ve had trouble getting over people I’ve never dated. I think this has helped

Bless you, good, good man...

You can have hope while working on yourself.

This is very good advice

Any suggestions on how to kill the hope if you have to be in contact because of a shared child?

The hardest thing i'm having to deal with personally is my own expectations: I EXPECT her to behave in the way I want. I EXPECT her to respond to my points in the way I project them in my mind; That leads to high amounts of frustration, and i believe once I acknowledge that, I'll either be able to better move on or understand the true reasons why we broke up in the first place. Either way, I believe I can become a better person, and consequently find someone more fitting to my needs, or even win her back (ok, that last part was my hope still alive hahaha). Thank you for the vid

People need to learn that no contact is traumatic and harmful.

I have an ex who is a sister of a great friend of mine. It’s exhausting hearing her name, seeing her. Like a dormant injury that flares up every once in a while.

I don't know how to express this but I'm so so so much grateful for you, your work, and this video. I genuinely needed this. Thank You for helping me.

Damn

If you wish to forget your ex find someone else as simple as that, replace them with other person, within no time you will forget for sure ( that's what my ex did,found someone within a week and it's 100% working for him)

Exactly 💯 a

I wish I could have been counseled by you when my marriage of eleven years ended. It took me way too long to get over it. My mother would say “Don’t nurse your hurt” which you refer as ruminating. I realize why it was so hard. At least I have the tools now to recover quickly from a broken heart.

Hope is what keeps any addiction alive..let it go 🎈

Life changing video ❤

I found out that he was " my creation" ..my fantasy that never existed

Alright so every time I ruminate or think of man she’s probably xyz do I tell myself it doesn’t matter or anyone got an example?

You legend. Needed this. Thank you