6 Mistakes Couples New to Polyamory Make

Is love truly a limitless resource though? I think maybe that's why people don't like the idea of polyamory, outside of the jealousy factor, is that because in some aspects humans only have so much love to give. Is this incorrect to say?

Currently looking for this type of polygamy relationship myself

the distinction between rules and boundaries were such an eye opener for me! i just started exploring if i could be poly and your videos are helping me tremendously!! i would love a video where you go into details about boundaries

Brother, this whole thing stinks!

what's the difference between love and attention?

#1 Thinking poly is good.

Quick question: Why do people in polyamorous relationships put rules and boundaries in place?

Letting your girlfriend take your balls is your first mistake 😊

So everyone can be happy- not possible. Good video though I am doig this poly thing now.

S/o to all of the other poly people out there ❤ love u all platonically

i’m trying to understand it because my partner came out to me as a poly the other day but everything make my heart shatter and makes me want to throw up. i don’t think i will be able to accept it maybe because i am a mono with bpd. i don’t want to break up with them i hope things were better but it’s not

Ive been in a few & I always say that poly relationships are 70% talking & 30% sex😂 start small & go from there

OPP unethical? Na. Its just different strokes for different folks g

i got drunk on mouthwash td and am now in a throuple.. dk what happens from now on

Hello there, I am new to non-monogamy, I have always known that monogamy didn't come naturally to me however It took me a long time to finally admit it to myself because of the way people might view me. I introduced non-monogamy to my "partner" but we have not done anything with other people. Simply because we haven't found other people. I have a friend (whom my partner has met) and connected them to each other because I feel like they could develop an (enjoyable) connection, they both agreed to get to know each other and see what happens, one of my concerns is if it does happen, how do I speak to my partner about not being affectionate(kissing, flirting) with her when we hang out (I am pretty sure that I will become comfortable eventually) however I know that it will take some time getting used to. How do I bring this up in a way that doesn't feel "restricting" to their connection? I know that it's like why are you thinking about this if it hasn't happened and it's because I have a knowing feeling that they will connect beautifully.

My partner doesn’t let me spend my money on needs. Like a haircuts. Since I pay for his subscriptions which I told him hey I don’t like this and can’t afford it anymore with medical insurance and health problems

Poly basically being a open player

Polyamory benefits women and lgbtq. My advice is if you’re a straight man, unless you have a lot of money, don’t get into this. Ruined my life. But hey. At least my wife is having a great time.

Mistake #1:
Being polyamorous

Seriously where was this channel when I was a little baby Poly girl?
This is an excellent resource and I’m really thankful it’s being provided to people in the community! You’re amazing!!

So he is in fact, not down with O.P.P.

NRE is something I've been having to address with my partner at the moment. I think it's a huge red flag that her other person admitted to feeling less excited to see or spend time with his wife when plans fall through, while my partner was saying she felt the same towards me for our own reasons. I personally think that it should be a requirement for the original relationship to be on a solid foundation before anyone else is introduced. While I've had that heart to heart discussion with my partner about where we had been falling short because of our own individual hang-ups, I don't feel good about knowing the other guy feels that way about his wife. Something is just bound to go wrong and I don't want to be a part of that or bring that into our physical home. I'm not alright with being adjacent to a relationship that breaks up another home entirely.

Honestly, I can see why people are adverse to these kinds of relationships because they force you to be even more honest with yourself in a short period of time than traditional monogamy would.

I just love the pair of water colors (?) on the shelf behind you. ❤

Ironically: what about One Vagina Policy, that sounds great, guys will be able to explore their homosexuality!
Just to clarify - it is ironic message of mine to highlight how stupid OPP is.... If guys with such thoughts wanna explore, they should try homosexuality first, and then reject OPP in anyways to do not force women to do things they don't want to do....

I think one of the dilemmas I've run into being in a throuple is trying to find something the 3 of us can do together and enjoy. I have fun dates and special interests with my boyfriend and my girlfriend but trying to find something all 3 of us can agree on is so hard. I was the last one to join the party my girlfriend and boyfriend were dating before I joined.

My partner met another man that she fell in love with within a month. After she told me this, one day I asked her if she could help me a little with some very mild jealousy from her NRE. I told her I was very happy for her and literally the next day, she went to spend a nite with him and she never texted me “I love you, I will catch up tomorrow” which was something we both always did before we went to play with our partners. It was something we established from the beginning and never missed it once. I was very upset… it hurt bad. She told me she was too busy and forgot. There was another incident 5 days before this happened that was pretty similar with her. I can’t trust her now and it may end our relationship. This may sound like an over reaction to some but I am having a tough time with it.

Mistake #1: Ever entering a polyamorous relationship in the first place.

Best part of polyamory… left overs😂😂😂

OPP, either way, feels just wrong.

Wonderful video on mistakes for those new to polyamory. There are so many complexities to it. Also I went to check out your art. Love ,love, the "Consent is Hot" sticker!

lol not me in a triad as my first poly relationship-

how are boundaries only for yourself? youre pushing such a toxic relationship, if you set boundaries about things that you dont want to happen and your partner doesnt respect them then what kind of relationship are you in? One filled with no care for the emotions of your partner and only care for your own selfish WANTS.

Mistake 1. Doing it
Mistake 2. Doing it
Better suggestion, stop acting like a dang animal and learn some self control.

#1 - Making rules instead of boundaries
#2 - Agreeing with rules or boundaries you are not comfortable with to please your partner
#3 - Establishing conflicting rules or boundaries with different partners
#4 - Trying to date too many people
#5 - Forcing a throuple

❤❤❤

My husband proposed to transition when we separated and he went back to live to his country. He met someone and stopped caring about me... She was hostile towards me, they made a drama because they didn't know what to do with me being in the picture. Long story short, I decided to divorce after 8 years of marriage and now they are going mono and uploaded a bunch of pictures on Facebook because they are super happy together... I guess I'm a fool...

It´s been really cool to watch you teaching fundamentals to us <3

So what would be considered polyamory level one what would someone new to polyamory do for level one?

heh... These sounds like Public Policy mistakes too.

Definitely very helpful!! ❤

thank you! i find the concept of NRE really helpfull as a tool to combat jealousy. if my partner is head over heels for a new person, it doesn't mean they share a deeper and more meaningful love than we do (in the established relationship). it's just a specific kind of euphoria that comes with new relationships, whereas the existing long-term relationship has many other meaningful feelings to offer (like comfort, security and the joy of knowing each other so well)

Would you mind making a video on relationship anarchy? The term honestly confuses me

Grateful for your content and points of view (And ofc the merch is awesome🤌) Would love to see some longer videos and maybe diagrams/charts or visual aids🙈

Great content mate....🤗🤗

I wish I had your YT channel in 2007! Thank you for being genuine, clear and sooo helpful. 🖤

Woohoo! Always love your polyam content, can't wait to see more 😁

Great video! NRE is so addictive; I'm glad you touched on this. It's essential to be considerate of the feelings of everyone involved

I was tempted not to hit the like button, since it had 69 likes at the time, but I made myself do it. lol

I mostly agree that boundaries are what are needed, not rules, however, I don't think all rules are bad. I have only three rules for my relationships:
1.) Inform me about any STD's
2.) Inform me if you're (my partner) dating anyone else
3.) Inform me if and when you're going out on a date and where you'll be

The first rule is to protect myself, the third rule is for their protection (if something happens, like an emergency, I want to know where my partner is and that they're on a date rather than finding out from some officer that there's a missing person or John Doe issue), and the second rule is more a matter of trust. If we're not talking about the fact that we're dating other people, then we may lack consent.

They're still rules, because I'm placing them on my partners, but I believe they are completely reasonable rules. They aren't rules to limit, but rather for safety and consent. As you said, not all rules are bad.