16 Overlooked Autistic Traits in Women

Twirling the hair... I'm learning about stimming and never thought that it was a part of it 🤔

I'm in my early fifties and still do it - my mother confirmed not long ago that I used to do it all the time when younger.

I am "back on the horse" (ASD) since, a while ago, I was very sure (after reading ASD life stories) that I was on the spectrum - light bulb moment for me. I went to be tested (the whole thing), it was mentioned in the report "out of the question" that I was on it; not enough evidence based on their testing (i.e. was able to look at people when talking to them - was "trained" to do it younger, knew nothing about geography - never liked geography, why would I learn about it, and so forth). Plus, I now realize (with new info) that I was highly masking at the time, affraid to be my true self - probably didn't help for testing.

At that time, I researched for 3 years (videos, books, etc) to make sure that it was ASD. Now, what I find online (here), is amazing! Much more information than before, with explanations that ASD is way more diverse than the typical "mainstream" symptoms. It's so great that it's now talked about.

Your videos/topics help me a lot! Thank you so much for sharing, and help! 😊🩷

This probably autistic man also frequently prefers to communicate in writing. Among other things, it forces me to slow down and think about what I'm saying. I also find the written word much more precise than the spoken word.

I rub my feet together...kind of embarrassing lol

We're underdiagnosed because we're trained from birth in "female behaviors".

The communicating better in writing is so relatable. I cant even pray with out writing it out. I definitely still pray just by speaking or thinking but I don’t feel the relief of actually having talked and communicated with God اللة unless it’s written down. When my husband notices I’m upset or something a lot of times I go into another room and text him. I can’t have a serious conversation like that verbally.

I need to have other women watch this. I thought every woman feels like this all the time. I thought we always do what others say and ask, pretend to interact and fake being social. I cannot imagine doing those things and enjoying myself😵‍💫

gaslighting is basically comparison and avoiding your own feelings about what you do. It takes time to see what works for you, if it feels right then it's good for you. You need to satisfy your own needs and find your own, more enjoyable way of doing things. I don't find this autistic

Feeling depleted after social events is a sign you might be introvert

❤Saying things literally just shows exactly what you think. There is nothing wrong with it. We humans make too much of everything. If everyone would keep to their originality and accept every part of themselves, we would have a lot healthier society. And by accepting ourselves we accept others too, because you already know that everyone has their strength and flaws. We don' t need to put labels on everything, you are this or that. You are just a human. ❤Saying things literally just shows exactly what you think. There is nothing wrong with it. It can me harsh sometimes and hurt someone s feeling. If u don't know or care about the people I can say what I mean. Many times it's better to keep my opinions to my self. They are here to help me navigate through life and it's just the way you operate. I find it great to be able see things as they are.

Masking and people pleasing just means you have abandoned your true self and prioritize operating by others needs first than your own. Sometimes it takes time to understand but it's very simple. You are not born to please others and sacrifice your own happiness. There are patterns that take time to be unlearned.

Everyone I’m friends with thought I am autistic while my mom swears up and down I’m not.
Update: I think I need to go to the doctor-

Points off for using a pedos research.

I was recently diagnosed by a therapist that I am seeing for social anxiety - I work with students with moderate/severe disabilities and I really connect with them on a different level than many others, so just two weeks into my new job, I decided I needed to go to college to become a teacher - that's where therapy came in; I wanted to be able to look people in the eye, have meaningful conversations with parents, and basically BE normal. It was an emotional realization that I never even considered (even with my son and grandson being ASD) yet, here I am at 54 years old, and just finding out that I wasn't just weird growing up! Okay, I was weird, but for a reason.

Can you get to the point please?! Thank you!

ty..xoxo ❤

All seem familiar. But I don’t want to be autistic

I pick at my nails constantly. Always have since my earliest memories. Not sure that qualifies as stimming but I suspect I’m on the spectrum. Watching videos on autism is like the biggest ‘aha’ moment for me and it all makes sense.

Okay, i little cried after during this. I've known I had ADHD for a few years now and recently been wondering if I was autistic too. I want to still go to atheripost to get an actual diagnosis, but almost if not all of these point hit real close to home. I have a duaghter who I've been wondering if she is has opened my eyes at maybe I am because of similar behavior. Thank you so much.

Thank you. I am newly diagnosed at 46 years old.

You are amazing!!!

Hi l seem to have most if not all of the traits described. I always chalked it up to being an introvert. How is hating large crowds, small talk etc different and an autistic trait. I’ve also liked to write more than converse and just thought I was shy.

Yeeeah, this made me think I'm on the autistic spectrum even more. :d

I'm curious to understand how to distinguish the difference between ASD traits and trauma induced behaviours.

Definitely gaslight myself because society doesn't accept behaviours.

I must admit I really hate the use of cut and paste behaviour because I read it either as being mocked or as fake. It's become more and more the way of behaving, just be yourself.

I must admit I really hate the use of cut and paste behaviour because I read it either as being mocked or as fake. It's become more and more the way of behaving, just be yourself.

Female autism should represent a biological female. The gen pop wants to act like genetics don't affect us, but they do. There is a reason biological Women present differently.

Thank you 💛

I haven’t been diagnosed with autism but this video has definitely made me feel seen! Thank you!

My stims are leg bouncing, chewing skin on fingers, lips - I absolutely don't sit still well. (52 yr old, ADD too)
I can completely agree with the "sterotypically girly girl stuff" terrifies me. I was always a "tomboy" country/equestrian/biologist more masculine minded - I absolutely do NOT relate to cheerleader types - 2 different planets. My child is likely on the spectrum too and as a 14 yr old in this day is getting swayed by all the gender issues.
I can literally grasp all the new terms - I just want to die some days than to live in this new world - it is too unstable for me.

what does AFAB stand for ??

Hi, first time listener and first time comment.
I was listening to your video and I found a lot of your points valid and interesting.
But the way you had described the female with autism or Asperger's seems more like a standard introvert. I myself have a lot of these characteristics. Difference was I had an unpleasant childhood due to epilepsy so I never was quite high with socializing. But now that I'm older, I do not mind being alone. parties do drain me and I'd rather be alone. If I was at a party I would observe in curiosity rather than partake.
Although some of the key points you made really do relate to me as an introvert, it's interesting how introverts and some females on the autism spectrum are very closely related. ❤😊

Had to give up watching in under 4 1/2 minutes due to your “political correctness” overload, such a shame as it could have been interesting! So am moving on!

Try being in your 70s before you received a formal diagnosis. Now 77, redheaded, a Proud Female Aspie, 😊 who bears many scars emotionally but i have made it through, an only child, neurodivergent with 2 neurotypical parents, who claimed to Love❤ Me but didnt understand ME very much.
But i had an Uncle Howard, i was drawn to Him, i befriended Him, because as i look back, He was " on the Spectrum". My Grandmother was his sister, paid Me the compliment " of all Adah's grandchildren, you are the only one I. Can easily stand !" I was the mother of 3 children, my middle child was my " soul child", everyone often says they have a favorite Muppet- his and mine was Gonzo, adrift in a world where no one was like you.
So here i be, brilliant( many of us are) aspie, dont always pick up on social clues, sensory problems, my worst I would shout at my children " I cant hear You!" Not deafness, i was hearing 3 conversations,which do i pay attention to? And things are like a radio off of its proper station, garbled.😢
And may I share with You , June 18th is World Neurodiversity Day- a Day for all of us to celebrate. And the whole month of April is Autism Month!

I feel I may be Autistic and ADHD, possibly some Anxiety. This video rang the most true for me. I’ve masked so well my whole life that I never knew I may have more than my Major Depressive Disorder and Addiction. Reading articles of what Autism was like for women as children and having a son with Autism, ADHD, Anxiety.. made me realize the similarities. Most of my masking techniques have no longer served me.. to the point that I really struggle to function at 40 years old. My biggest coping mechanism and mask is humor.. but I was raised to be a people pleasing peace keeper.. so I rarely considered myself, as long as I did my job. I starting having panic attacks a few years ago. I’ve never understood why I felt so different from everyone around around me.. “wish you weren’t so f-ing awkward, bud” is one of my nicknames.

what if i was a normal child but i have most of these traits as an adult??

I would imagine talking with your hands is a stem as I've done that all throughout my life and as you are doing all throughout your video.
I'm just starting research on ASD because an autistic friend of mine has noticed a lot of similarities in our behavioral patterns. He's noticing how I react to stimuli, if not exactly like his, it's very closely similar. As I'm nearly 67, I'm wondering if I should get tested or just leave it be since I've learned to live with it. I'm me.

I was told I had to "build on tact" in a performance review.

fascinating.
I was never labeled as 'gifted' or 'sensitive', I was labeled as 'the stupid one' or 'the dumb one' or the 'mentally challenged one' or 'special'

I want to tell you that some of these social/relational copes are actually more common in neurotypical people than you would think! But
I have ADD. We have crossover symptoms with ASD.
Anyway, it's important to understand that more people are "masking" out there than you could know, some people are excellent at it and most don't want to acknowledge it. Social rules can be exhausting for a lot of us. Hang in there peeps
I can tell you society is a lot more understanding than it used to be, but keep in mind a lot of these masking type skills ARE necessary for success in education and workplace. Get/stay good at them.
When it comes to personal relationships, find people like yourself who get it🤗

I constantly rub my tongue on the back of my bottom teeth. All kinds of different patterns, but always specific patterns, and number of times each spot is rubbed. Holy crap. I had no idea.

Please.can you get to the point.

Not me watching this and realizing some things I do aren’t considered “normal” 😂

I've been thro tests and I didn't result autistic but I feel like I've been hiding for the most part of my life but I wasn't aware about it until something small triggered my mind and I found myself hiding behavior and then I saw tiktoks of autistic female girls, then I found sources and TedTalks and I really relate to those (especially the ones made by females) about the struggles and feelings we share, I told my parents about this when I thought I searched for enough evidence and they told about all the tests but I'm continuing to search for things to better understand others and how neurodiversity is and again I relate so bad, now even this video (I underline it's entertaining and almost funny in a certain way) and the only thing I don't relate with is having socially acceptable special interests and it's not true for me in fact I don't spend much time on my real special interests (except my two main because I go in a school where I study those and I find myself diving in videos that go further than school and I find myself saying/thinking the topic or the solution to a problem before the teacher tells the actual thing, in fact he often tells me "good" "right!") and again it's not about feeling different and left out (because I've been friends with people with more peculiar personalities and I feel lonely even with them because I don't get a chance to be myself), also that, but the actual struggles behind the facade and the feelings of looniness, being misunderstood, feeling like "not enough", let's say all of this is almost depressing (I know some people on the spectrum end up depressed and I don't want to invalidate it by saying "almost") and feeling really hard and not be able or/and fear to express it doesn't help. Lastly, you wanted to read about secret stims: personally I move my fingers like a piano but in a more careful way (I'm not like I'm Wednesday Adams dancing haha), I keep the tempo of songs by moving my head and feet a little, I twirl my hair and I scratch/touch my ears' zone (sometimes I find myself playing with the lobe of the ear lol). 
Idk what I want or search for by commenting here but here I'm.

(Trigger Warning) I'm an autistic female adult who was diagnosed as a child but Im kinda having the experience of someone who was diagnosed as an adult because I was never really treated like an autistic person growing up. I was home schooled and I was screamed at multiple times a day because I couldn't understand math the way my mom and the curriculum taught it. I wasn't allowed to stim or not act correctly in a situation or she got mad and would yell at me sometimes for hours, especially if it was in public because it embarrassed her, but would also brag about how good of a mother she was because she had such a well behaved autistic child 😒
Videos like these have helped me to understand myself a lot better and not see myself as a burden who held my mom back in life

Holy cow, you talk so much in the beginning. Please get to the point.

Around the whole being labelled as gifted thing, I (a female autistic who was lucky to be diagnosed at age 9) was always confused how one week I'd be given a letter inviting me to an activity/ event for the gifted kids at my secondary (high, I'm from the UK) school. I'd go to the activity/ event and a week or so later I'd notice that my friends (also gifted) weren't in school one day, the next day I'd ask them where they had been and they would say they had been at another activity/ event for gifted kids. I always wondered why I was invited to some of these activities/ events. It wasn't until recently (a few weeks ago) I learned about twice exceptional children, a twice exceptional child is a child that has a learning disability (e.g. autism) and is also gifted. I believe I was a twice exceptional child, that is why I was only ever invited to some activities/ events. The teachers (including the one in charge of the special needs area) were cherry picking them for me

I tap my feet or bounce my leg when I'm at a desk to stim. And I play with my earrings

Using female and male is okay. The science has find clear difference between the two sexe. Non binaire person would need both informations for having a overview of the problem. That s it. I think it's so important to follow science.