the pain of recalling memories of an empty life (playlist)

Im only 13 so ik other people here have been through a lot worse and im probably not gonna be taken seriously but here we go.
I used to be an absolutely innocent, happy, carefree kid. When middle school started i met this girl and we wound up talking and i started to develop feelinga for her. Eventually she found out and stopped talking to me for awhile but then we started again. This time i still liked her but wanted to just be friends. Life was good and we stuck together even through our school literally getting threats. At some point though, i found out she was only faking our friendship the whole time and that really hurt me because i cared about her alot. Also recently my parents decided to start just going on about all the things i do wrong whenever they get upset at anything and it really hurts me. Also struggling with gender and sexuality stuff and that my best friend told me its best for me to just be alone the rest of my life and never try relationships again.

All you have to do is remember where you were at and how much you have been through. Then you can appreciate where you choose to go next. It's truly that simple.

"Don't you understand? I may have been the one to teach you, but in the end, it's all the same. I have seen the stars, I have paid the bounty's, I have inspired queens and fought for kings. I have seen duality at its finest, I have seen it at its worst. But nobody remembers me. They remember the kings, they remember the queens. They remember the bounties, they remember the stars. The heroes are engraved into the walls, but the little soldier who inspired that hero? He isn't remembered. The one who yelled "We believe in you!" First? They are just the turning point in the story, not the important point. I was that man. I was the mentor, the inspiration, the soldier, I have been it all. But no one remembers my name. I have just been a placeholder in history. I was that nameless soldier who rushed in to tell the king we were being invaded. I was the first one to show my hope to the hero when the chips were down. But yet, I am, and always will be, the placeholder in history. I will never be remembered... The question is whether that is a very wise, humbling reality... Or the worst fate of all. " -character I'm writing that is literally nameless

Since i joined Nursing my life is stuck just btw college and assignment.... literally i don't have time to chat properly with family,think about own mental health...how should i survive 4 yrs in Nursing school: |

Please stop

This is some analog horror thumbnail

This is the most beautiful peice of music I've listened to in a very very long time.❤

I've always been a stepping stone..
The fixer, the healer, the pitstop, the layover..
The one people find and stay with until I've patched all their holes and then they go on to love and live wholeheartedly..
What people don't realize is the patches they leave with are pieces of me..
And I think that's why I feel so empty inside..

Why just why does life have to suck....

They didn't notice I was suffering they didn't love me they didn't care they never have

I feel lonely 🙁

...

the only memory that I have is being trapped inside this cold place called home

it's interesting how much a person loves and hates his life at the same time

I just wrote for 5 hours with this looping. Really sets the ambience.

You know too much

At the time of writing this I am eighteen. As I'm lying awake here at three in the morning, I've come to relize the current state of my existence. My entire life I've been told again and again that I'm so "gifted" and that I "have so mutch potential", But over time I've come to the understanding that none of this is true. I feel as if I've wasted my whole life struggling to live up to the unreasonable expectations of others. I'm a tired, confused, anxios, perfectionist, mess. Ever since I graduated high school I've been lost, originally I thought that somehow graduating would make my life easier but now I feel as though it was the only thing I really had to keep me busy. The days blur together, It's like somehow the time I have alone is both infinite and nearing it's end simultaneously. I want to do more with my life, I do, but it's becoming increasingly difficult to pry myself out of bed each morning, I wish sometimes that I could lie here forever and silmply cease to exist. no pain, no loss, only blissfull internal silence. Thats the worst part of it all the noise. I'm not sure if it's HDHD like my friends suggest or just my overactive mind but I feel that I don't controll the flow of my own thoughts. All thoughts are muddled by the constant static of a million others all vying for attention. This has the unfortunate side effect of making any motivation i can muster a fleeting commodity. I want to be a voice actor, I know it's a bad choice of carreer for someone who can barely hold a normal conversation but all I want is to make others laugh. With that I'm on the verge of falling asleep so I'll make this last part quick

I understand that This entire comment will most likely seem unhinged or frantic to most, And that is primarily because it is. This is not so mutch a story of my life up until this point as it is the resalt of my writing down thoughts as they come and go. I hope you can gleam some understanding from my gargin and thank you for taking the time to read this.

damn why are these so sad i'm just doin homework

I cry whenever I start to have feelings for someone..I am so scared of moving on from him..sigh

No we don't.
We aren't together in this world. If I ask help to strangers, they would not even listen bcs people can't trust peaople anymore.
And no, I don't thinks it gets better with time. I have waited and beeing patient for so long. How much do I have to wait? Will I die just waiting?

You know... I'm constantly thinking "Why am I here?"
I don't understand the world I'm living in, and I thinks that is why I don't enjoy it.
I'm tired, hoping life gets shorter and the end gets closer. I hope to never libe this same life again, in the "afterlife". I don't want to repeat. Never.

I m giong to turn 21 in december 2023. I have zero friends. I m weak in studies and suffer from depression And PTSD i think so. I have accomplished nothing in life. People r busy in their life. At the end we r all rooted to ourself. I feel like a dumb person. Purposeless and nothing feel good in life. When i read comments i get to know their r many like me who r suffering more than me. When i see young childrens working and i m eating good, i feel like this world is full of pain and suffering.
Plz write something world. I would love to hear ur comments.

I an afraid of growing up, I see everyone drifting apart, I see people around me grow and so do I. I just see myself in the mirror and remember the kid who had nothing to fear, just watching his little cartoons and shows.
I try to always live the moment but after the good fun times I always feel empty and sad, just wishing that good moment could last forever.

To the person reading this, have some good news ❤! Jesus died for you - John 3:16. If you do not know Him, seek Him with a genuine, humble, and repentant heart and He will reveal His existence to you. His presence is the most immense peace you could ever feel. Life with Jesus is better than anything.
We have all sinned egregiously against God and deserve judgement. God knew our condition and gave us all a way of reconciliation and salvation through His son Jesus Christ. Jesus endured the wrath of God for us and paid the price for our sins despite Himself living a perfect, holy, sin free life. All so we could be freed from the curse of sin and inherit eternal life in the new kingdom that will be free from the corruption of sin (death, disease, decay, suffering, etc). Life is so short, you have a choice whether you choose God's free gift of eternal life salvation from death. I used to be a militant atheist and HATED Christianity. All that changed 3 years ago when I had a supernatural encounter with Jesus that completely changed my spirit and desires to that of God's. I loved what He loved, craved righteousness, and hated my sin. My eyes were opened to the reality of sin and its different forms and to the spiritual war waged against us.
Time is so short friend. Believe in Jesus genuinely and confess it with your mouth and you shall be saved and experience the immense joy, love, and peace of the lord that transcends all ❤🕊🙏 The truth makes us free friends. John 8:32

This reminds me of my favorite quote “The last sunrise is always the prettiest.”

"If we do stuff and nothing happens... what it all means?"... These words by Jesse makes me really realize that what I did in the past will always be with me no matter what. I mean, I wrecked someone's future, her family, her chance... everything ripped all because what I did. And I'm still here... standing... doing crap with my life. I'm still the same person that destroy someone else's future. So I should just accept? and move on?, what about her? what about the lives I've destroyed? I can't move past that. I can't forgive myself....

good one

Been struggling with insomnia and been getting around 3 hours of sleep each day for the past 5 days ive realized how numb and sad I feel...😂

Llegué aquí por el título de esta hermosa música y la escucho porque armonizan con mi lenta muerte interior, sin ilusiones, sin anhelos y hundido en mi profunda soledad, melancolía y nostalgia. Creo es el presenitr de que algo mejor me espera en breve. Encuentren la paz interior donde ésta se encuentre.

i just like to feel sad sometimes.

sometime i just think about me in 30 years regretting
regretting that I didn't do anything that I didn't enjoy my youth

Thanks for the awesome playlist 🖤

It's likely that no one will ever see this. I am 15 years old and I honestly just want to die. I feel like living, or just life in general, isn't worth it. I'm not worth it.

I'm so sad, I'm so depressed.
Please, someone help me. I can't take it anymore.
I am so alone

Jesus is the God filled void that makes you feel this way. Repent and follow the Living God. He can save you. John 14:6. Best wishes, praying for you

The title alone drew me to it. The setting is so perfect as I'm laying on my bed, staring out the window, stargazing as i recall the past memories... of a not-so-empty life lived.

Whats the second sound called

reading these comments could lead to one killing them selves

Hello you who is reading this I just want you to know that you are loved and cared for by Jesus! He sees you and he cares about you and how you feel! Talk to him he hears you and will never leave you alone! God is greater than any depression or anxiety that you may have and I pray in the Name of Jesus that you may feel peace today ❤

For all those here in their late teens/early 20s thinking they've done nothing with their lives. We're still learning. We have such a ways to go. Our lives have just begun and just because you don't believe you've made a difference doesn't mean you haven't. You may have no idea how much you mean to someone else. At the very least.. all of you have made me realize I'm not alone in my own feelings.

It’s not the song. It’s the emotion that comes with it. Everyone has there own story. I have mine. I’m still young and my story has not yet started. A story that hasn’t started, but is yet feeling these intense emotions. I wish I could show you how I feel. I can’t explain it words. It’s just there. If I try to tell you, no words are going to come out. Blank stares, they say alot. If you really think about it, we’re nothing compared to the entire universe. Maybe if we just finally let ourselves feel what we need to feel. We’ll be better at feeling someone’s other emotion. If I’m being completely honest rn. I’m really saying what comes to mind. My mind has some many thoughts and sometimes it’s nice to write them down. Sometimes the thoughts aren’t nice, but it’s nice to some pressure away from my brain. This comment may be confusing. I’m sorry for that. Anywho, have a nice day. Remember feeling emotions are natural.

TYSM I JUST FEEL LIKE EVERYONE USING ME LIKE A MATHING TYSM SMT THIS MUSIC MAKE MY HOLE LIFE

I lost her guys. I lost her

Ive started being happy with life, thinking its all over now. Im happy living and excited for all, it still is, but i still feel that rot inside of me. Remembering through what did i pass and thought of these times, i still do feel like that most of the time. I at least hope this school year wont make me as drained as the last one did. Sigh. I dont even know will i live until 18 knowing what world is it now. But i got used to it knowing i could die any day. But knowing that i could be killed by a human being makes me feel ashamed being one.

BLUE IN MY HEART, BLUE IN MY SOUL (C)2006

I LOOK OUT OF MY WINDOW AND I SEE THE MORNING DEW.
THE SKY SO VAST AND LONELY AND LIKE ME IT IS SO BLUE.
BLUE IN MY,BLUE IN MY SOUL.

MY MIND IT IS SO CLOUDY AND HARDLY IS ON QUE.
REALLY AND REPEATING ONLY THOUGHTS OF YOU.
YOU IN MY HEART YOU IN MY SOUL.

DAYS GO BY,WEEKS GO BY, LIFE GOES BY.

IT HURTS SO MUCH INSIDE ME. BUT THIS PAIN IT IS SO DEAR.
THIS IS THE ONLY WAY I KNOW FOR ME TO HAVE YOU HERE.
HERE IN MY HEART, HERE IN MY SOUL.

To listen to this original song Google. james monahan original songs, BLUE IN MY HEART, BLUE IN MY SOUL.

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