NEUROTICISM: Understanding Our Attempts To SELF-REGULATE Around Unconscious Pain

Can we the board of behavioral science regulate influencers giving bullshit clinical advice which is a crime

you mentioned that you did a lot of readings that helped you link the neurotic pattern to hidden psychological issues..

can you please share some of the titles ??
thank you

Can you please speak about shame around sex and physical intimacy

Neuroticism is what keeps victims of narcissists watching videos on the subject over and over and over

Thanks

Thanks!

What a great video, I used to be very neurotic and even now still sometimes get disregulated.

But what you're describing as the reason for neuroticismmakes so much sense. That it's a cover for some deeper pain.

That's what IFS teaches as well. That one's unhealthy behaviours are usually coping mechanisms for different experiences you had where it WAS appropriate to feel and react the way you did.

After learning this about myself, I stay away from people becaue I don't want them to be entangled in my mentally ill life. I'll die with my own disease. People I like and may like me back, I shut down because they should live normal lives unattached to me.

I would love a video on your perspective on emotional permanence and how to practice it

wow, is it just me or does she have amazing eyes!! i mean she says smart stuff too, but sometimes i just get lost in them! i’ve never seen anyone with that particular shade of blue

Heidi! Thank you so much for this video. What book did you reference that connects neurotic behaviors to specific unmet needs

I think I like to restrict my sleep because feeling tired is more relaxing and soothing than feeling anxious

I hired a therapist a while ago but watching your videos has done infinitely more for me than the therapist ever did

Hi Heidi. Do you even know who you really are?

The vitamin analogy is BRILLIANT.

"All neuroses are a substitute for legitimate suffering." WOW.

. . . and being a traumatized autistic HSP / INFJ takes things to a Whole. New. Level. 😅😩😫

Massively underaddressed subject. Thank you very much

1) I was this many years old when I realized I was neurotic, and 2) How can I heal my neuroticism???

Thank you. This is an answer to a prayer because it's EXACTLY what I needed to hear. You are saving lives. Thank you🙏

Aww Heidi you're doing such amazing work, your life has such meaning! I just want you to know that I have learned so much from you, and even though I'm still on this journey, I wouldn't have made the progress that I have without you.

I also had a similar starting point -- everything always seemed just fine in my life, but a few maladaptive emotional habits kept popping up for me, and eventually it reached a pretty drastic tipping point that showed me I need to figure out where they are coming from and make changes in my life. And OH BOY what a can of worms that opened LOL. Being human is so hard

Hearing all of this was very painful but enlightening.

🤯 All of it!!! The validation is real! You're explaining things I couldn't put into words!

I’d love to hear you talk more about rumination and the need to overshare! Love your videos, they have helped me remember that I will always choose the pain of change and growth.

So a bit random, but as an enfp I think using the Ai chat gpt app has been great. It let's my random thoughts "Ne" deep dive into any subject with something that can keep up! I've found it incredibly helpful!

Hi Heidi! I hope this makes sense, but do you think you could do a video relating to getting out of victim mentality when you deal with toxic shame? How does one give themselves compassion and understanding while not becoming a victim to their own circumstances?

I feel like I've listened to similar content but didn't actually hear it. The way you present the information is very easy to understand and appreciate it very much. Thank you❤

Hi Heidi. Thank you so much for the video 🩷 was wondering if you can please do a video on how to heal loneliness this way? What do I do if my neuroticism comes from being alone and I can’t immediately solve my problem, such as making new friends? I have a hard time with that because I find that people aren’t as interested in me as I am in them, routinely :(. Thanks so much.

Please provide some visual flows that helps with digesting this material a bit easier. Or please write a few books, I can read those fast lol.

Thank you.

You, you and your clarity fantastic because of it. The information comes over so easy Peezy thank you so much.

Do you give private sessions?

Where would we be without Heidi? Thank you

Wow...that was EXCELLENT!

Perfect! A lot of is our intelligent….so smart, we hide things really well, from ourselves! This helps makes everything make sense. (I have Priebe surnames on my dad’s side :) you serve humanity so well!

Dang. ❤️🙏🏻❤️

Well done Heidi!

I've never listened to a clearer way of explaining neurosis and "personality" patterns . Thank you so so so much Heidi 🙏🙏🙏

Is this process any different when you have ocd or relationship focused OCD?

How to get rid of fear and shame

I've never had anyone explain why I'm so crazy this way before. I've gotten better because my husband is extremely emotionally stable (his childhood involved actual trauma and he's been through years of counseling that helped him with developing this stability), but I used to pretty much be insane. Prior to my husband, every guy I met left my life voluntarily and specifically due to the fact that I was insane. And I 100% knew that I was, but I would still beg them to stay and apologize and promise to get better and to go to counseling (which I did, but it never helped). Sometimes that worked, but never for long.

Anyways, it was my husband that actually discovered the core of the problem was the way I was raised. I never would've looked to that, since on the surface, I had a very privileged life. My physical needs were more than met, my parents stayed together, and my mom was always around since she was a stay at home mom. Yet as I got to know my husband better, situations kept coming up where I was not aware of either how to do a skill that most people know how to do or I completely misjudged a situation or a person/people as either dysfunctional or "fine" when they were the opposite, and eventually we came to realize my parents had never taught me anything about people or life or emotions. I thought that in and of itself was normal -- I was like, why would my mom know any of those things? Or why would she talk to me about them?

I had assumed everyone else who seemed to be adjusted and functional had just picked up on these things throughout life and I was a failure for not having learned what everyone else learned automatically. But after hearing about my husband's childhood (which in many ways was far more dysfunctional and traumatic than my own), I realized that parents were supposed to at least attempt explaining these things to their children. Even if they were wrong, at least it would give the child a starting place.

Anyways, thank you for these videos -- I'm in my mid 30s and have constantly been interested in psychology and why people are the way they are and yet somehow I've never once come across content exactly like yours. You describe why I am the way I am now in a way that no one else has been able to do.

Holyyyyy. This was eye opening. I feel that whenever a guy is prodding me with questions as him critiquing me.

Wow. 🥹

I’ve felt weird all day and don’t know how to soothe myself. I grew up suppressing my feelings and now I’m finally learning how to dig them up and identify them, but it’s hard. Having you as a resource for support has taught me so much and helped me to make actual progress. Thank you. 💜

Where do you learn all this information and how to deal with these problems? I haven't encountered a lot of the stuff you address in your videos(in therapy or anywhere else). But every time I watch your videos it changes my life.

Wow, i have never heard it all explained in such a simple yet informative way. This has given me such a sense of ease knowing I’m not crazy for feeling the way I do. Thank you so much, I truly just felt a giant weight off my chest that I had been trying to lift with diet and exercise lol your videos are a god send and are greatly appreciated!

Thank you for this. I found you and this video almost exactly as I needed in time; to hear this information presented in this way has been a big help in my current ordering journey... lol and thanks!

Thanks!

While I enjoy these videos and self analysis- I have a disdain for the acronyms used. Medical terms not commonly used in everyday speech results in parts of the message being lost.😢