The Effect of Emotional Neglect Symptoms on Highly Sensitive People | Dr. Jonice Webb

I need a referral to a VERY GOOD psychologist for this issue> since I’ve been menopause(hormone imbalance), have been diagnosed w/a lifelong chronic fatiguing illness, and dealing with such horrific depressi9n…..all that ON TOP of being an HSP. IT IS TOO MUCH! Please help me

My thoughtfulness being seen, viewed or misinterpreted as a weakness, THIS has been making me so crazy lately. It’s gaslighting me when I’ve reached out to my sisters, 33yr old daughter, husband and M.I.L, yet they all Show little to zero interest in being supportive for my discovery into my HSP.

I MOST Def experienced emotional neglect as a child, then at barely 17, my mother packed up, left me, and moved away w/my 3younger sisters. I remember as a young girl, wondering why everyone constantly said I was so shy, but I didn’t feel shy. I actually enjoyed having friends, I wanted people around me, but only for a time. I’d spent vast majority of my time alone reading and doing crafts.

HSP = likely to be Autistic. I was finally diagnosed at age 61 years.

We also get targeted out in our families as “black sheep/scapegoats.
We’re the “truth tellers” in narcissistic and controlling families..

Hi. Thank you so much for sharing this video, I really appreciate your kindness. And I'm also thankful for the comments people have shared, bc its nice to not feel alone💝 I have suffered greatly on planet earth for decades. Being hsp and not understanding my self in general on many levels also😞 I have a lot of trauma and looking for support with other hsps. Im in Washington state, and I recently got on SSDI, Medicare, Medicaid and wondering if anybody knows of individual or groups?

5 years so far of mental & deep emotional suffering and unexplained physical chronic illness, all due to being an HSP raised in CEN home —the reason I’m more and more convinced with. It’s been 4 years since I discovered Dr. Webb’s and Dr. Arons’ great articles and books and I’m healing, though slowly.

"Turn your tongue 7 times into your mouth before you speak."
"Whatever you feel, put it into your pocket and you tissue above it."
"Think about the African kids dying of hunger and you'll see how happy you are."
"Cry, you'll pee less."
"Stop crying or we'll give you a good reason to cry."
"You'll be allowed to express an opinion when you pay the bills."

Dear Dr Webb,
Your message is always very clear and easy to understand.
I identified my husband a little while back as a product of CEN after listening to one of your videos. It has been very enlightening. He has followed it up with some professional help. Thank you for the information and the strategies we have gained so much from.
C Richardson.

My mom often said I was over sensitive and acted like she shouldn't pay attention to me while I felt that way.
When I was young I thought it would be better if I died. I don't think she knew. I felt that way though. Because I had to hide it and would cry under my sheets in my bed. 😢

I had never heard of CEN or HSP, but wow, this explains a lot about my life and my adult relationships. Thank you!

Plz create SHORTS to comress the knowledge in a nutshell thanks

Yes, I am a hsp. no, I'm not going to counseling to fix it.

This is me and All my children HSP children usually have 1 or both parents who themselves were HSP and they suffered from CEN and it affects how they parent their own children in reverse. My mother parented me the opposite of what she received from her own Mom. Her dad met her emotional needs. I put up a wall because of increased sensitivity to others feelings

My mother gave me to state custody when I was 12, and always told me to "toughen up" lol no wonder why I suck as an adult

A breakthrough for HSP and CEN . A combination which I recognise and , thanks to you can now manage - 🙏🙏 to learn to own and celebrate xx

I think the most sad part is that one day you stop believing that you can be helped. And that you even deserve it.

I'm crying right now. All of this is my childhood. I am so HSP. I would love to find a therapist that is educated on this near me. Thank you for your videos.

This is all so interesting! Makes me wonder if this is why I excessively ask my children if they're ok and ask if something is wrong!

This video has helped me not to hate myself so much, but to feel a measure of kindness and mercy, and some peace. HSP - YES! CEN YES! Now let’s add physical, psychological, and emotional abuse, as well as always being the target of bullies, and you got ME.

My partner send me this video in relation to her feelings. Well this video not only explains a lot but it gives REAL hope and encouragement for the future. So thank you Dr Jonice.

My theory is that we’re so divinely connected/preserved, that what’s normalised in our world is actually perceived as very broken to us (and rightly so!) We’re comparing the world around us to the divine standards that we knew and are made of. So in a way, we’re really “not of this world”. It doesn’t mean we’re better — but that somehow, our divine nature was preserved when so many others were born desensitised. It’s okay that they are though; I appreciate the steady, constant care and support my less-sensitive friends are able to afford me (because they’re less easily overwhelmed and burnt out, they can be there for me!)

On top of the emotional neglect, I was abused by a mother with narcissistic traits and severe anger issues (she would become hysterical nearly every day). The dad was just checked out... mentally gone... and also emotionally abused me. Could you make a video on that please? Thank you!

When I was a child/preteen, some judgemental Sunday school teacher accused me of trying to be different “for the wrong reasons” — to get attention or something. Little child me internalised that, even though in reality, I wasn’t even trying to be different at all. I just was. I perceived situations differently from others and thought about things differently and had different values. But until I realised that, his words loomed over me for a long time and were so intrusive. Of course, I didn’t have emotionally available parents to tell me who I was/wasn’t, and so I internalised whatever criticism other adults threw my way (usually, they were projections!)

I feel so sorry for my inner child now and want to take good care of her to make up for all those distressing years. She was being abused at home too.

Any other 20-something year olds here? I see a lot of older folk in the comments!

growing up always feel frustrated that I can not receive the help and support (practically and emotionally) I need from my mom is the main struggle.

I am the highly sensitive kind and my mom is the type 1 well intentioned but neglected themselves parents. Which makes it extra frustrating.

Thank you, your video's are very helpful and insightful.

Aah, yes apparently emotions are weak, irrational and girly (they liked to add a bit of misogyny in there).
1) Emotions are an excellent resource, value them
2) Pay attention to your emotions, allow your emotions inform, guide and protect you
3) Make a conscious decision to heal the childhood emotional neglect

I do watch some gore videos, processing what it was like for a victim, honouring him that someone understood and felt for him and be aware of dangers. But I can't watch boxing or injustice to children and animals - it's like here and now, stressful, and tightening the throat. My alcoholic parents passed me down to the elderly grandparents, then they passed me to their other adult children, so I changed 5 schools and lived in several families until being pushed out on my own at 17. I am sober all my life and hit the education hard to find some inner stability, a current. Being in different chunks of accidental, emotionally immature, addictive adults who always lived parallel lives to mine, I am a true loner now and don't consider that I ever had a real family. It is freeing to learn psychology, it took me a couple of years to come so far. Thank you!

Dear Dr Webb, I found your video as a pot of pure gold. It's very clear, precise and assuring. Basically, this is all I always wanted to hear but was looking for it in other places. I've taken the notes, nearly word-for-word as it is now my plan. I am determined to be healed. Thank you so much! Subscribed, discovered, changing!

I am definitely super sensitive, never felt like I fit in any where. I learned to stuff, stuff, stuff my emotions. I am the black sheep of my family. My mom used to make fun of me when I got upset. She said, "You are not normal," many times to me. I have come to find out may be 3 years ago my mom and estranged husband ate narcissists. So hurtful and damaging. I struggle every day for the last 14 1/2 years when he took off with someone else.....

I was raised in a single parent home. My mother was either working or partying. I was so alone. I am called slow a lot.

This really hit home for me, validating my feelings about my parents and siblings. It’s taken too many decades, and I am just now confronting the messages I internalized which had weighted the choices I’ve made in life. Thank you.

One thing I know for sure is that having to grow up with HSP, yet not knowing what it is or why you feel the way you do about "EVERYTHING", it utter HELL!!!!!! Which is then magnified x1000 when you end up with a multitude of (other) sever childhood traumas, that just mixes the living hell out of your brain. Then your shoved out into the world as an adult without a single shred of info on how to live in such a evil, dishonest, controlling, selfish, narcissistic, unloving world. Then by the time you figure it all out your live is a complete shambles and too late to fix it. Living in a world where you feel like a complete alien is no life at all.

I was the HSP in a EN home. Dad made me the object of mockery for being “overly sensitive”. He was a type 3 Dad, and an authoritarian. Even as an adult, I would leave Dad’s home feeling physically sick. I am 64 years old, and finally learning the name of what I went through as a child, “emotionally neglected”. Thank you Dr. Jonice!

I am 57 year old woman. I knew my family was dysfunctional in many ways. I knew I was different and I never fit in. My mom had me at age 45, my siblings were all much older. My mom was not mentally stable, I was the loneliest child growing up, dreaming about what my life would be like when I grew up. I was named spoiled, a dreamer, dramatic and I was always dismissed and told to “go away”, I never felt included or valued as anything other than “the baby”, a burden for all to bear resentfully.
I’m overwhelmed with this information! I never imagined that this existed or that I’m not the only one who grew up this way. I cried everyday during adolescence, I struggle with abandonmen because at 13, my father put my oldest narcissistic brother in charge of finishing raising me. I was grounded for no reason my entire high school years. I ran away at 18, with the first boy that came along and I’ve been running ever since! I wish I had been aware of how damaged I was and the impact it would cause throughout my life! I forgave my parents many years ago. I haven’t been so successful with my siblings. I am alone now with no family, it is my choice.
I will explore this wth your help! Thank you ! You are an Angel! ❤

Thank you! 🙏
I identify as voidpunk, because it's been my way of embracing my otherness, that had been supressed in the past. My biggest issue is that I cannot even tell my partner that I love them, because I learned to hide any emotional vulnerability deep inside of me. At times I think I cannot feel much, even though I know it is in my nature.

Lots of love❤ thank you so much for sharing yourself. I saw your latest video too. Feels blessed to hear you. You are not alone dear😇 Secure marriage couple was sharing about how they deal with it if that helps❤

This is my childhood and my life!!! My mother could never handle my emotions to the point of embarrassing her when I was just a child. I felt very alone as if my mother hated me. I was the crybaby of the family "We have to walk on eggshells around you" and treated like I was fragile and unstable. Sheesh. I'm very sensitive to light, sounds, and smells, which to this day my sister rolls her eyes at because she doesn't smell things the way I do. I tend to spend a lot of time on my own to avoid "bothering anyone" or being accused of being picky and difficult. Thank God my husband is an amazing human being! I discovered this HSP thing just recently and have been researching, I'm so glad I found this it will help both my husband and me understand it better. Thank you! 🌹

As a side note, a lot of HSPs are actually on the spectrum, but don't realize it. If you identify as HSP, especially if you're a female (where diagnosis is often missed, due to looking differently) look into autistic traits in females.

You managed to package this up in detailed accuracy. It helps me accept myself and love myself the ways my family should have bothered or cared to understand. You have described my life experience within my family. I grew tired of never getting beyond the lack of interest in my life experience from them. I accept their toxic lack of compassion towards me and am fine with being invisible, less painful. When my child lay dying in the hospital and I never left her side for weeks and weeks, not one single family member visited or supported. Guess I was just overly sensitive? They are so committed to their hostilities, they missed seeing real strength in real time.

Any woman who thinks she is HSP should also consider whether she meets the criteria for autism because autism in women is catastrophically under- diagnosed and symptoms are similar. Hope this helps, good luck!

They are not accepted for who they are ♥️

I feel seen. I don't much like it. I'd much rather go back behind my mask, please and thank you. 😢

Very important video!!!

I identify as an HSP and I avoid ANY and ALL commercial advertising in and of ANY media. I actually HATE such messages. Well, except for Super Bowl ads which are meant to be cute and funny besides being incredibly annoying.

Thank you for this information!!