Stalkers - Motives and Personality

I found it best to withdraw. Process internally

Stalked, gang stalked, threatened, harassed, smear campaigns, you name it. Had protective and straining orders again a couple and there are just writings on paper for the criminal minded. They mean nothing to them or their flying monkeys and the police don't enforce them usually because the damage is done by the time the police show up and then they tell you it's nothing they can do if they don't catch the criminals in the act. America is a ses-pit of toxic leeches, liars, abusers, criminal-minded and there are never consequences for these individuals/groups. The legal system against them is useless too. Sad that people have lost their lives because justice in America is only for the slick-minded criminal. Even if the stalker has committed acts or proven crimes against someone and you clearly have shown no interested in being bothered with those individuals, they keep harassing and stalking and the legal system allows them to get away with it. They can run a smear campaign a hundred miles long and the minute you speak the truth, they are acting like you did them some harm. They really believe their own lies.

One tip is to eliminate all social media.

If you chose to keep social media, lock it down so that you only have trusted friends, cannot be tagged, all setting are private (not public). NEVER post where you are in real time or do check-ins. Only post after you have left and preferably places that you will probably not go back to, so in the rare event your stalker goes get access to that post they will be stalking in an area you will not be frequenting.

I left domestic violence and pressed charges on him and me and my children then had multiple places we went to for safety broken into amd even a battered woman shelter broken into with them screaming my name out of fear the staff hid my car and then gave us s police escort out of state...Yet somehow that delivered us to tuem they were on yhe Greyhound bus able to talk toe personally asking about money strangers ( one from a night club i attended 2 years before) i dudnt recognize hom st first. It was relentless and across multiple States and Jurisdictions and the police detective was helping him to avoid arrest crazy ss that sounds..I had witnesses tell me police came to talk to him in person lied to me saying they knew he was in wrat Virginia so again between proxy stalkers and the flying monkeys helping him and willing to commit crimes to try to scare me and my kids. Then the Cyberstalking started and felony wiretapping and evasdropping on us and doing everything possible to make sure we knew we were being watched. Unbelievable events and actions never accountably for any of them .I no longer trust law enforcement at all...or thier agency's..Sad tragedy for me and my family.. Decades later 💔 its still gives me chills...PTSD.

When I was in my mid 20's I was stalked by a man 30 years older than me who was living in the same homeless hostel as me. He was thrown out when he got into my room and cut up all my clothes while I was out at a party. He continued to come round to the hostel every time he'd been drinking and hammer on the door shouting threats and abuse. I left the hostel and got away from.him.

Thanks

Deceptive work behaviours such as turning up to play House and Garden with vulnerable family members. Overstaying normal work hours and attempting to intimidate people who live at the premises. Becoming angry and agitated when you resort to ignoring their very presence. After announcing that you wont be present when they are on the property and have given yourself wide birth from them all day, you return home only to find they are still hanging around on a weekend night. This is not just one occurrence. This person is interweaving themselves with family members and has been collecting data. I have questioned the validity of where all this requirement for works has come from being that it wasnt required previously? And that they should leave the premises at an appropriate time on a weekend for peoples' privacy. Commenting on your appearance and bringing gifts for other family members is creeping behaviour that is unprofessional and unwarranted. Be very careful who you invite to work at your property. 🤔

Have you ever heard of organized stalking, Darren? It's stalking by a group, but not for the motivations you have described here. Instead, it's powered by serious lies told about the victim. It's carried out by groups within each city, causing the victim to be harassed wherever they go. Fairly sophisticated through-wall electronics, including voice-to-skull are used. The stalking groups fancy themselves as "special police." For reasons unknown, the actual police don't go after these "True Justice" clubs.

I tried to go to go the FBI because of the size, depth and extent. They wanted me to bring the evidence. There isn't a single person that will help me without a significant amount of money to be paid. The stalking prevents me from earning a living wage.

Very important video even strangers who act like they know you and say where you have eaten what you watch etc. Orwellian type stalking goes on

Insecure attachment style has been linked to stalking behavior, as people with borderline and narcissistic personality traits, common among stalkers in the criminal justice system. People with insecure attachment style often rely on external validation and when faced with relational threats, they tend to employ maladaptive coping strategies i.e. stalking. This can lead to misguided attempts to maintain relationships or retaliate against perceived threats where stalking can be understood as an expression of attachment pathology. Research in attachment theory supports these findings, with studies indicating that many stalkers exhibit insecure attachment types, particularly those with anxious attachment styles. Preoccupied (anxious) individuals are also prone to compulsive relationship intrusion, further highlighting the connection between attachment and stalking behaviors.

Pathological narcissism has been identified as a significant factor associated with stalking behavior. When individuals with a high degree of pathological narcissism experience rejection, it results in what's known as a narcissistic injury, compelling them to relentlessly pursue the other person to restore their self-esteem (Meloy, 1999). This restoration of self-esteem may manifest through vindictive actions, such as sending disturbing messages or sharing once-private photos online. Narcissistic individuals tend to possess an inflated self-concept and struggle to understand why others don't share their perspective, which can lead them to rationalize stalking behavior (Menard & Pincus, 2012). Ultimately, the drive to rebuild their self-esteem motivates the narcissistic stalker to either reestablish the connection or seek retribution.

Source: Alice J. Parkhill, Margaret Nixon, and Troy E. McEwan, A critical analysis of stalking theory and implications for research and practice, National Library of Medicine, published online Sep 22, 2022

Zoe Turner, Stalking and Attachment Theory: Causes and Management, Ph.D Dissertation, Department of Psychology, The Graduate Center, City University of New York, 2020

Stalking. What is the Psychology behind the stalker? Dr John Crimmins, Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist, The Behavior Institute

My stalker of over 2 years was told by police to stay away from my area, he has stayed away, but will he ACTUALLY stay away?

It’s so hard because this person met me online in World of Warcraft. Managed to use my first and last name to get the voter registry and get my address and phone number. Now they’re making multiple Facebook accounts and bombarding the local small business I work for with gruesome pictures and threats. Reporting and blocking for a year so far and it’s not slowing down. The lack of someone human on Facebook to tell, half my reports don’t even get accepted cuz the accounts they make are so new. I’m at a complete loss! I haven’t engaged either and it’s still happening so frequently!

Its so sad that the police can not do more . harming animals , and actually trying to kill them ? that needs to be addressed . Your life and your animals lives are in danger .that is not your normal creepy stalking , that is dangerous . It should be treated as attempted murder!

I've been accused of being a stalker before, but I didn't have any malicious intent, I just wanted to be friends. I feel bad for the guy but don't know how to resolve the situation, and now he doesn't like me. Here's my perspective on what happened:

Throughout my first 3 years at secondary school, there was this one guy who was always bullying me, which I found really hard to deal with, but that's not relevant just yet. Fast forward a bit and this guy's best friend (the one who I was accused of stalking) made a song and published it on his YT channel, but at the time I didn't know about his channel so I didn't know about the song. Then one day in form time, the friend was given permission to play the song to the whole form, and he did. In my opinion, this song was just so much better than anything I could ever hope to produce. I also got a glimpse of his YT name after the song and saw his channel was doing much better than mine (pretty small in the grand scheme of things, but compared to my channel it had quite a large number of subscribers). I honestly was jealous of him, of the fact that me and my bully's best friend are about the same age, but he seemed to be doing so much better than me (his YT channel was doing well compared to me and he's better than me at music).

I was also around the same time trying to find a solution to the guy bullying me. I thought if I told a teacher about him, he would get in trouble, realise it was because of me and would just bully me even more. I was hoping to instead become friends with him, but I thought there was no hope in ever directly talking to him as the situation had gotten too out of hand. I eventually thought of the idea that I could try to become friends with his best friend, and then maybe through him I could become friends with the actual guy himself. The friend genuinely seemed (and still does seem) like a good person, and he had never done anything to annoy me in the past. But I'm a huge introvert and don't have the courage to go up and speak to people in person, but I find it slightly easier to interact with them online. I thought maybe if I was active on his YT and subscribed to him, then I might have a chance. So, I decided to search up his song after school that day, like the video, subscribe to his channel with bell notifications on and also comment something (he didn't know who I was so I felt it much easier to comment than to talk to him in person). I started off by commenting some not too weird thing that I can't remember exactly. But then, my ASD kicked in and I felt an uncontrollable urge to point out a bunch of spelling mistakes throughout the song, with a few over the top compliments thrown in to undo the bad things I pointed out, so he knew I wasn't saying the song was bad. This was a huge mistake. I didn't realise this at the time but apparently, over the top compliments don't seem genuine, so looking back on it, he probably thought I was being sarcastic, but I'm not the smartest and I genuinely thought I was being nice by commenting on his video to hopefully make it more popular. I even listened to the song on repeat for days and eventually, I for the most part carried the video all the way to 1000 views, making it one of his most popular videos.

But that's not all I did to try to become a positive part of his community, I also joined his Discord server. Big mistake. He DMed me asking who I was. To this day I have no idea why I did this, and I know I shouldn't have done, but I first made him guess who I was for a bit, which I just thought was a bit of fun, but I guess he didn't see it like that. Then I told him. Instantly blocked on Discord and hidden from his YT channel. This was my first sign that I should've taken that he doesn't want me on his channel, but I didn't see it, I just thought he had just had a bad day or something like that and moved on.

He later made more music, which I also listened to on repeat, and since he didn't have one on his channel, I decided to create a private playlist containing all of his songs on my channel. Then, he unlisted one of his songs. This was when my selfishness shone through, but I didn't realise how selfish I was being until much later. I still had the link to this unlisted song, and I didn't think it was a bad song, so going against what he would've wanted, I decided to make my playlist public so that other people could still access it if they looked for it. At the time, no one knew about this playlist except me, and no one really ever did find out about it apart from him, but I'll get to that later. Then he actually privated this song, and now it's lost forever. This was when I suspected (correctly) that he seemed to be in a cycle of releasing a song and thinking it's good, then later on he would stop liking it and eventually get rid of it. So, being the ignorant selfish guy I was, I saved all of his existing songs into web archive, removing his privacy and meaning that he could no longer ever fully delete any of his songs, simply because I thought they were good songs and still wanted to listen to them. Later, when he deleted some more songs exactly as predicted, I put a description of what to do to get to them into my public playlist description, meaning anyone could access them if they wanted and so they're not really private.

Then, he found my playlist and commented on one of my videos, saying if I didn't private or delete my playlist of his deleted videos, he would take legal action using YT's copyright system. This was the point when I finally realised way too late that he doesn't want me anywhere near his channel, and I would never be able to become friends with him or the guy bullying me, so I did what I should've done months prior and stopped. I unsubscribed from his channel so as to not see when he uploads and deleted the playlist. Knowing how selfish I was I feel really bad for him now, I can't even imagine what he must have been going through, but I think if I ever speak to him again it will just make the situation worse. The guy who was bullying me also found out about this and started bullying me even more.



TL;DR stalked a guy whose best friend was bullying me as an attempt to become friends with both of them, ended up getting bullied even worse

I have just watched the video and liked it, but I felt related to many things that were said, and not only the victim suffers, the "stalker" is in real pain from being rejected and never achieving or having what they want, thing is, it's painful, and I still can't get over someone, but it's like a pattern, damn, can't stop thinking about her.......

Then there is the defensive counter stalker who isnt a stalker at all but someone who must keep the stalker and flying monkeys on their radar to ensure they do no more harm to them. Self defensive counter stalking isnt a disorder. I have an old boss whose little mafia are still destroying my life in any way they can although there isnt much left 10 yeas on.

Why isn’t there a register for stalkers and offenders like this

Hello everyone. I live on the 3rd floor of some apartments. All 3 floors are Narcissistic people, when I come out my door to go to the store. One or Two people be waiting when I come back.

My stalker is a 65-year old plutonic male coworker who over the last 18 months started stalking and following me from a distance. He started inquiring about my whereabouts from other coworkers. He’s always staring at me and watching my every move. We were totally plutonic as he talked about how he would never cheat on his wife. Then when I realized that he had a thing for me, I began avoiding him and I don’t engage him at all. I guess this angers him and he’s constantly subtly hanging around me and causing me great anxiety. I don’t know what to do. He is fully aware that I have no interest in him. It’s been almost 2 years. I don’t want to report him. He’s got over 30 years on the job. I’m so tired.

The CIA = Group of stalkers spying on one or several people.

Communities are now helping these organizations that do this,companies ,or a person wants to discredit, they can hire an organization to run a smear campaign, then harassed to coerce the target, I've gotten threats,harassing from community, some police, and other companies as well,I'm guessing this person played the victim role and seemed help from others to harass me,a company republic just had a truck driver pull up by my job a blow his big rig horn at me,this is common, for one they are harassing me at truck driving jobs because I have a cdl,and using keeping out of my chosen profession to harass to do what they want, on turn they use truck driving companies to harass as well, also stores I go in,and other buisnesses, this is very hard to believe in the normal world,bur sadly our world Is more narcissistic, and more willing to persecute anyone these people want,these people choose to help get Into other people's issues and attack,it's surreal, and not many places for targets like me to turn,I hope somehow karma comes back around for these people willing to destroy others lives they don't even know.

Many "Stalkers" are lonely bullied by the majority don't have multiple friends like you do.

Many ostracized people for being ugly, losers, creeps who want to befriend people in general but they fear the mob. So they start talking to one to one online with people.

Many people falsely accuse intelligent lonely people as stalkers because they have a very rich social life with multiple contacts everyday, and are often too dumb to even remember everything what they said to other. While many "nerds" who are in fact intelligent usually get called stalker by multiple people they interact one to one.

If everyone would say : never talk to a stalker it would make it only worse for stalkers trying to talk to others. It's like a self fulfilling prophecy in many cases.

these stalkers are mentally and morbidly obsessed with everything i do in my life and somehow they can think for me apparantly. they keep saying that what i was taught i think is the truth and i never said that!! i belive in it from what i seen. i never once said what i believed was the truth. i hate when people try to assume what i think.

My stalker is my soon to be ex husband. He has installed an SMS trojan on my phone. Even going so far as to contact my cellular phone provider and get them to help. He's saying that I'm cheating on him with my male roommate. He has tried to kill me numerous times. He is dangerously obsessed with me. I know he will kill me if something doesn't change. My city is like a small town. He always finds me. I have PTSD and he is escalating his behaviour. He seems to fit the profile of a sociopath. Every time I get a new device he hacks it too. Any tips or suggestions welcome. This is terrifying, and he has a secret second family, and wants me dead. Because he doesn't want to pay alimony. So that's why he's doing that.

💯

Thanks for explaining the good and bad intentions in detail! There is no reciprocity in bad intentions towards others. That explains everything.

So my stalker was seeking a romantic relationship with me. It all started in 9th grade for me. But his fascination for me probably started in kindergarten. I was just minding my business going from class to class. He was in two of my classes but he didn’t seem to notice me. I noticed him because I thought he seemed familiar and kind of cute but I put out of mind.
Then one day he saw me without my glasses. He said to his friend. “It’s her!” Then he proceeded to tell me that we had met in kindergarten. I agreed that I thought so too.

After that he made some crude attempts to get my attention. Mostly he would show up in the same places as me. Places he wasn’t supposed to be at like near the girls gym. I thought if I ignored him he would give up and stop bothering me but unbeknownst to me, he was following me way more than I had realized. Those time that he “showed up” trying to say hello were nothing he was following me all the time everyday from class to class. He knew my route to classes that we didn’t even share. He followed me to the bus area. One time he sat next to me on the bus. I thought it was odd because why did he sit next to me of all people. I was certain there were other spots open. He said hi to me. I don’t remember if I said hi back but then he just stared at me the whole 15min to my stop. I felt so uncomfortable. I thought about asking why he was staring at me. Then we came to my stop and I grit my teeth because I had to tell him to move. He moved on his own and I was relieved. I thought he was going to sit back down but instead he walked behind me all the way to the driveway of my house and then turned around and left. The only reason I knew is because my brother saw him and asked me who he was.

I think he developed an obsession with dating the cute girl from kindergarten. I wasn’t necessarily me in the present moment. It was the girl he met back then. He was obsessed with my face. My physical attributes but he cared nothing about my feelings. He was only obsessed with my looks. If he found a doppelgänger that looked just like me he would probably be obsessed with her too.

I’m not in love with him and I want him gone . He’s relentless and controlling he’s disgusting . He does all this and gets away with it Becaue he’s a cop .

My stalker thinks we were in a relationship Because we exchanged texts . I only gave him my number Becaue I was drunk and now he thinks he owns me and bullies me Becaue he wants me to fancy him and be with him he repulses me . He is a policeman and very manipulative. I hate him .

My stalker wanted to shame me in front of my peers. It wanted to degrade me. It also wanted sex.

So do you think this means that most private investigators have like borderline personality disorder or narcissistic personality disorder? Because they obviously enjoy that kind of career or they wouldn't stalk people for a living.

I, personally, have dealt with stalking for quite some time now, and not coming from a stranger but from a relative. Mainly via the internet than in person. Darren Magee's examination on the types of mental disorders which stalkers deal with; for my relative, I believe is suffering from a personality disorder (due to childhood trauma and parental abandonment). Does not excuse the actions to which I have suffered, all of which have been criminal. But the only thing I supposed one can do is just pray for their soul and some direction because they will never change unless the stalker themselves comes to the conclusion their brain is very unhealthy and they need to seek treatment ASAP to get better.

Had a person come up from behind me and tried to throw me down a flight of stairs I called the police there was no witnesses to validate my story they won't file a report based on hear say. Days later he's at my home digging through my trash. I see him visit my job and I caught him following me to my friends house. Police says these individual occurrences don't constitute criminal behavior. I don't know what to do. Even as a martially literate power lifter with hundreds of hours of boxing experience I can't hurt him because I'd be charged with assault.

I'm a young man in my 20's and I had this happen to me by one predatory camp gay. Im not bad and I have no criminal record but it was so distressing and I was getting feelings to terminate the muppet from existence.

Hi. It's steph again. 2 min 15 sec. One reason you left out Is curiosity. One might only want to see life through another eyes

The problem is that cops will do nothing about it until it goes too far.

Government stalkers are the worst! They do it 1000 people for years until they have too many other stalkers!

I cannot see stalkers as sapient beings anymore, they're just calculative instinct-driven creatures with directives of eliminating targets like a parasite worming its way to feed off you. Soulless entities, lowliest scums.

I was in a DV relationship with my ex, left him 6 years ago, it started with him following me to work, my daughters school, vandalising property, I lost the police avo as the magistrate thought I was alienating him from our daughter, then he proceeded with FLC manipulation through that process it allowed him to manipulate lie and control , except I was awarded sole custody which infuriated him, he has recruited family members and his children from a previous marriage to follow, come into my workplace, receiving unwanted gifts, death threats, love letters, letters stating where I have been, abusive phone calls.i had to change jobs months ago and now its happening in the new workplace, my daughter had to do school online as he tried to grab her from school, the police in nsw are useless, I have to prove he is sending these people to my workplace, he can drive up and down and park in front of my residence, the police can't prove he continuously sends me death threats.He is a master of lies and manipulative tactics, I have a safety plan in place, engaging with a psychologist and a trauma therapist, I have ptsd, sought help as he had me suicidal, seen countless lawyers, domestic violence outreach support units, last week I was advised not to acquire a avo as it may provoke him further. I have continued to call police to report and unless you are physically bleeding and battered they won't intervene, my doctor and psychologist document everything.I have just recently learned that he has been surveillancing all my mobile phone calls for the past 10 years through a teleco error, he's unemployed and has the time to monitor these phone records, change appointments, coincidently turn up where I am, the nsw police response; its a isolated incident. HOW MANY ISOLATED INCIDENTS DO I HAVE TO HAVE? The perpetrators are protected, that's why women are ending up dead. Every single day I'm terrified that he will kill me or my daughters[ who have had no contact with him for 6 yrs by their own choice]. I go to therapy every week to try and keep myself on a baseline as its so tiring scanning your surroundings every time I leave for work or the supermarket, I never socialise as he is watching from afar and then I'm getting calls from people saying where I have been,I'm hyper vigilant and have so many health issues from this unwanted, repeatitive behaviour of his.WHEN IS IT GOING TO END?

I have been stalked by a woman for the last 50 YEARS - yes - 50 years! She stalks me and finds the people who are close to me or my business associates, and then uses her social power to legitimize the lies she spreads about me. She is a lesbian so its creepy. She hates men and has been involved in anti-rape, and more recently in child abuse. Her public face is one of caring and promoting women's rights and human rights, but in fact she is an abusive narcissist.

I find it very disturbing how many times I have been stalked through my life.
AND ITS CORE.... THE SHATTERED CHILD/AND ADULT FROM A SADISTIC NARCISSISTIC FATHER.
for I walked down the street looking at my feet in shame. 
I can remember questioning myself and life as a 5 year old walking alone home from school.
"I can't be that bad???" for as the first born I was the scapegoat for the family... 
"if you didn't do that, say that... your father wouldn't have done that". 

I was stalked by 2 men in a van calling me to get their van as that 5-6 year old.

later I was stalked the same way as a broken high schooler, again walking home alone... then 2 men in a van...
I pretended the home I was in front of was my own and decisively went in the back door and waited for them to leave.

I was stalked all the way from a grocery store to the front door of my first apartment at 23 years old.

now I am married at 68 and I found I married a raging narcissist . I ran after less than a year married.

I am very concerned for my safety. he loves his guns and is completely delusional.
I have stumbled my way back into public art jobs... (yes he gave me a gift in terrorizing me out onto my own 2 feet again.)
and I have had to make a courageous choice to pursue my public art projects that are lining up in front of me.
I can't live in hiding, it will be no life.

I have chosen to set my fear aside. do what I love and brings joy to others.
and if he does do something physical to me.
I'M PISSED ENOUGH TO LIVE MY LIFE WITH GUSTO UNTIL THEN. MAKING THE BEST OF MY LIFE GOING FORWARD.

You can’t reason with a stalker. Notify the authorities and your social network. Document, get an attorney ASAP!

A former partner stalked me for over 4 years. Followed me on dates, tapped my phone, interrupted mail, he was relentless! I isolated, horrified to speak up out of shame and fear of not being believed.

Why are their lots of people today that believe its normal, or justified to stalk and harass someone? These groups really feel like its the thing to do,what is going on to change reality for these people? Is the group so good at normalizing the behavior?

Thank you. This was extremely helpful.
BEAN

Absolutely stupendous, Thank you Darren for your help and getting the Information out there, Peace, love to you and everyone, Thank you universe 😀😍♾️🧿🥰👽👽🌌🛸✨️✨️😁😃💞

I would also like to suggest as a way to avoid such situations in the workplace that if a name tag or plate is needed, that it be the worker’s first name only. It’s rather difficult to trace everything from social media to phone number and address without a last name. I suspect that’s how my stalker got my name to file reports with absolutely false accusations as I don’t generally introduce myself by my full name, and a simple “Hi! My (first) name is…” should suffice in the office.