What do you ACTUALLY want from a D&D game?

I want friends to play with.

I just like to make a character that plays the missing link of id, ego, superego in the group :3

I do love a bit of role-playing. That is until shopping comes around. I just want to know what I can buy so I can get it and move on with my adventure. I dont care about the shop keepers personally. Unless it's important for the plot oc.

During Covid lockdown, we all ended up in online Discord voice-only RPGs. Typically- the trope holds- a buncha nearly identical sounding NorthAM neutral accent American English guys. Endless confusion about who is speaking, as well as whether that was in character/ the player talking out of character. Even a simple voice mod or voice mannerism would clear things up. ... nope. Not a chance. Your typical wargamer has no willingness to flex their atrophied likely never used roleplay muscles... too bad.

Optimizer isn’t necessarily a minmaxer, I mean, I’m too stupid and impatient for all those numbers when my artificer cleric can just be a weird little being and poke random objects which randomly seem to smell of coconut. I optimize my insanity and nothing else.

I was confused if I'm the actor or the problem-solver... then I remembered I don't actually like DnD puzzles, I just have anxiety and a prepensity to avoid conflict.

Dammit. I was already chuckling when she mentioned the "30 to 40 demographic"... which includes me.

my current dnd table has a socializer who’s our friend and just wanted to hang out and its been amazing to have her around even as an actor/instigator type player! she plays a sorcerer who’s magical powers come from being the only PC who’s able to break the 4th wall (between asking questions about how the hell the game works and crazy high perception rolls it became a bit) and just recently when she adopted a kitten she named her cat after an inside joke from our campaign! It has been so fun to watch her engage with the game, even if we know she’s mainly there to eat pizza and hangout with friends ❤

In my experience, I personally feel like The Optimizer tries to make their character either more powerful or more important than the others and they refuse to have almost any weaknesses and prioritize that over character depth, growth, story, etc.
That’s just my experience tho

I think my entire group might dip their toes into Optimizer. (That sounds so weird but like class dip? Mulitclassing? Yeah.) DMing gets traded off and we're all minor nightmares in regards to balance.
This does occasionally go in the opposite direction because some of us have made characters that are specifically Bad At Things.
Also I'd like to think I'm primarily a Storyteller but I think messaging my DM the plan I had to hold a city hostage (depending in the outcome of a couple things) might put me in the Problem Solver category.
For my Necromancers out there, releasing control of dead you have stored in a Demiplane is still a perfectly functional fighting force in your favor so long as you have a way to get away from them. It is also a horrifying threat to most people when you mention you have a lot of feral undead stored in your pocket dimension.

i understand socializers, but jesus does it ever frustrate me when a dm explains a cool scene and i look to my right and half the team wasnt paying attention

This begs the question then... how do you bring together a group of friends with different playstyles? :O

I'm a problem solver and storyteller i think. With a dash of socializer, because i do enjoy some dumb joking around. But if it goes too long or is too often in a session, i do get a tad annoyed.

I think there's a missing option. The DMs player.

Girls are always socializers 😂

Something not mentioned is also knowing the type for your GM. If your GM is very story telling, then you may not want to make a character that is grid based tactical. Other combos can also be less than satisfying. Being a 3.5 skill monkey when the DM wants to just use advantage hand wave the checks. You need to have a character that works for you, but will also fits with your GM's style. (I'm an Optimizer/Instigator that everybody assumes to be the Problem Solver. I'm currently the DM, but will hand off to a Storyteller next spring within our decades long group of friends.)

Didn't expect to be called out by a Leeroy Jenkins reference today

I just started playing and im definitely the socializer but also a people pleaser so im trying to learn as much as i can about dnd so i dont come out as "disruptive" like u said

"You knew writing that 3 page backstory would pay off someday" I feel absolutely called out!

Hail to the Gemini 💖

When I played D&D in high school, there was a Socializer type who would do her makeup during the session and barely paid attention during the game. She was friends with the DM though so she got to stay, even if she forgot when it was her turn to fight.

So, my question: how does a good dm get "The Socializer" to engage with the game outside of their turn? I'm having trouble with this because I have one who's always on her phone...

Thanks for this, it's really helped me understand some problems I was having fitting into a new group.

Wasn't sure what kind of player I was until instigator showed up. "Your party encounters evil black ooze on the wall." "I lick it."

Actor and storyteller are my jam! Thank you for going over these. :D

I would be the actor but I can’t afford dress up I’m poor 😢

shield master and storm barbarian is surprisingly fun. being able to take 0 from a meteor swarm is just plain hilarious.

Ginny is a great jokester. Conflating the Godfather pt2 with Paddington so deadpan... chef's kiss.

I like exploring and looting for treasure, also discovering secret things. What dose that mean? I guess not DnD. A, explorer, I see

This really helped me
If you don’t want to read any more there’s nothing important beyond this point
So I have 3 player lets call them C, D and H. During the previous session I hosted they were so chaotic and for any event they are. Well not H. C and D are guys anf H is a girl. C and D were very chaotic to the point of C taking his pants off. I’ve since realised H was there for the game, C was sort of there for the game and D was probably both there to try DND and to socialise.

Me watching a 16 minute video on picking tables knowing full well the only table within 40 minutes of me is my school group where we only get 30 minutes a week

I’m an actor and explorer. Heck, yesterday I was in a game session where I stole a book to read during our next rest. Now, the DM’s smile probably means that will turn out badly… but my character is completely unaware of that. Oops.

As a 24 year old, the Leroy Jenkins joke was amazing (I thought my husband and I only knew that existed) 😂 @GinnyDi

Lol explorer and problem solver would perfectly describe me LMAO 🤣😂. I can come up with a simple 509 step plan to create an easy ambush for my party to kill a skeleton and then loot it. 😂

I'm a storyteller when playing my cleric. I'm a min-maxer when playing my rogue. So I guess I'm a mix of those two types.

I mean, I guess you could call me a socialiser, we're there to do stuff as a group; then a fighter maybe as it takes time for people to get through their turns. Maybe it's the other way around and my ADHD just needs to get through the time. Great vid, sent it to my best mate who was always the DM to see if it tracks in his view. Thanks for this.

I like storytelling, fighting, socializing, and acting

Don't forget that dread sub-category of Socializer-the Game Widow (or Widower, just as likely these days)! Just there to make sure the Significant Other isn't up to no good. I've actually seen a couple of these turn into decent players...also seen a lot ruin games.

I am some weird mix of explorer, fighter, problem solver, a sprinkle of optimizer, storyteller, and sometimes actor. But then I get occasionally bored and go full instigator. And of course I prefer playing with friends instead of online randos, so ... also a bit of socializer? Also depends on the character I am playing.

I feel like I'm the optimizer only as a response from past trauma 😂. Can't kill me if i have bigger numbers than the DM knows about!

So, all of our party is a bit of actors, but not too much; personally I am mostly the instigator, 'cause I get distracted a lot, struggle to follow the plot and at making decisions, so my way of engaging is to follow what other players decide to do and touch everything along the way, unless I'm stopped by other characters.

Honestly, I would be an adaptive player. If I ever get anyone to play dnd with me, I'd just make it work. Playing whatever role is needed to make everyone stick together and have fun. Seriously, you would not believe the eye rolls I get when I even mentioned dnd to anyone know. If it's not sports or a nagative few on a some group, everyone stops listening to me. Oh well, at least I have these channels to watch and enjoy. 😅

I'm not only primarily a Socializer, I'm a member of a long-standing group of same. We all have aspects of the other player types. But we've realized that this is our primary motivation. We just like having a structured activity that brings us together on a regular basis and gives us something active to do together so that we don't spend half an hour deciding on what movie to watch and then playing with our phones for the next 2 hours.

Having said that, I and a couple of other members have found recently that we would probably enjoy a bit more acting and storytelling. We're trying to figure out how to shift our dynamic without losing what makes this game fun for the more casual members who are perfectly happy to engineer a +18 stealth modifier and make numbers go up.

I’m a fighter, but not the damage dealing type. More of a damage healing type. Just as damage dealers get a rise out of a crit hit, I get a rise out of bringing the party back from the brink after taking a crit hit or aoe.

Man I kinda realized I'm a Problem Solver (who leans more towards fighting) who's DMing for a bunch of Socializers (who lean towards the narrative parts of the game) and it's been burning me (and likely them) out a ton because we are super polar playstyles. Do I completely readjust everything to be light combat with some story, or make everything bare bones so don't have much to interrupt?

I’m definitely an Actor-Storyteller, with some of Trying to Keep the Chaos to a Minimum. I don’t think this will work well with my current/next (First!) (We haven’t done a session we’re still making our characters) DnD group, cause the DM is just doing a generic fantasy story and isnt going to work in our backstories cause it is kinda a lot of work

Many of us are struggling right now and for those who need to ground themselves in something normal and lighthearted, I have decided to post this video as scheduled. Please be kind to each other (and yourselves) today. ❤