A Reframing of Masculinity, Rooted in Empathy | Gary Barker | TED

Singular narratives are injustice to humanity.

I blame the internet. Propagates every negative attitude and stereotype in magnitude.

Patriarchy effects men too

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There is a word that unites a man and a woman in the process of self-identification. For some reason unknown to me, it is not used. Presumably it is impossible to use an adjective, and even if the dictionary allows you to change the part of speech when using a word, the mind still prohibits it.

This is a terrible talk, why is it only about the masculinity in men? What about the toxic masculinity in women?

Interesting, I actually clicked on this to learn how to improve myself. Luckily my upbringing already taught me all these things right. I wonder why it was so different compared to others though. My upbringing wasn't dramatically different than other boys. What are the factors? Education, financial background or father role?

is empathy a masculine trait or a feminine trait?

Well, what a simpleton way of looking at violence. Do you happen to know that in Latin America the physical violence from mothers to their children is not only normalized, but encouraged? Oh, yeah, but somehow that'll be because of patriarchy, and how that causes women to abuse, and advice that abuse amongst them to their children.

Excellent talk. I think it is worth noting that harm comes in a variety of flavors irrespective of gender. Some are more direct and overt. Others creep insidiously. However, as long as the narrative continues to be that a man is to blame for all of the ills of the world based solely on his gender, problems will not be addressed from all perspectives. This comment is not meant to imply that the speaker was blaming men.

Thank you for your work and also acknowledgement of women's unfinished equality too. All of this is FOR all of us.

Whenever this topic is raised, the comments prove the point.😔

What a load of sexist drivel.

bravissimo

THE ONLY AUDIENCE RESPONSE was when he spoke briefly about women’s issues. I was disappointed by this talk, when I clicked the thumbnail I was genuinely hoping for a constructive conversation about the issues that surround men’s emotional development and men’s mental health, instead I get 11 minutes of what men have done wrong and 2 minutes that can be condensed to “we should care a bit more” those 2 minutes where met with silence. It really reflects what I’ve been saying for some time, men’s issue are irrelevant to most women, our mental health is an inconvenience and when it comes to male aggression the conversation is still completely focused on the action and not the cause. Only when we address why SOME men are so angry, and why men SOME men are aggressive will we begin to understand how to resolve what is by far the biggest problem facing gender equality today.

This feels like some things I've heard about how "No man has had a healthy male role model, so they dont know how to be healthy male role models."
For anyone interested in diving deeper on this, I'd recommend the book 'King, Warrior, Magician, Lover'. It talks a lot about male archetypes across cultures.

This reeks of weakness. Men are not weak nor should they be. I don’t think this guy understands men. I don’t even know what this guy is talking about, my friends don’t understand what this guy is talking about. What 50%? These statistics seem made up honestly.
Empathy is fine to a point, expose a child to much to it, he will be weak and unable to exist in this world. Life is tough get with the program.
Men have become weak enough, no need to weaken them further…

This reminds me of Manbox.

Finally!!

I have zero male friends because of this. I feel like all my “friends” are this version of men and try to compete rather than celebrate the differences

Good talk.

That was one terrible ted talk.

I prefer calling it Humanity (empathy) and to careless about gender, etc. But I understand the need to counter toxic masculinity, unhealthy behavior, violence, etc. Above all, while I actively support feminists, it is very true that we need to talk about men's issues much more and face it (it tends to be pushed under the rug). Excellent talk by the way.

I have some deep rooted, albeit traditional, beliefs that define me as what a man is, and what makes one. Yet if I were to tell women I’d be labeled toxic and you’d judge me and lump me in with males who are not men, as I define them, such as rapists, domestic abusers, Incels, etc. without even knowing anything about me.

Too bad capitalist imperialism and toxic masculinity are a match made in heaven

He just said we bring some boys up badly (rightfully so), later talks about boys struggling and being lost. Which is a huge problem. What is the reaction from mostly the female audience? Laughter. And that’s because most DGAF about men that are struggling. They say they want men to be more vulnerable, but they’re often met with laughter. “Suck it up”. For some there seems to be a war of the sexes going on where one just has to come out on top, instead of trying to live in harmony. So tiresome.

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Excellent talk!

Texas and Guns go Together!

We need to be Gentleman again, we can be masculine without toxicity.

I am a male, but I do not particularly identify with masculinity as it is known. In a prefect world everyone would be kind to each other and cruelty wouldn't be a thing and I try my best to live up to that ideal. I know it sounds naive and perhaps I am. If it gets me killed, I'm fine with that. I don't want to be a part of a world where cruelty wins.

TED will give a microphone to any effeminate man who wants to "reframe" macsulinity.

Moms are the better Dads ...

He’s talking important points, but he’s adding to the problem generalizing these tendencies to all men, instead of specifying a group, albeit a majority group, that needs help. Otherwise you risk associating personal growth with parting with your manhood.

The problem is that women are attracted to traditionally masculine and successful men who are kind but not feminine. Pretty much the opposite of this man.

I never thought I'd be mansplained on how to not be a man.

He’s stroking the egos of an all female audience 😂😂😂

More attacks on men.

If this video resonated with you, i recommend the work of Niobe Way.
She has a great tedmed talk on this platform and i first heard an interview of her on Stay tuned with Preet called The Crisis of Loneliness 🎉❤

Urging us to turn away from voices perpetuating harmful stereotypes he takes the current stereotype that masculinity is toxic by default.
Protip women are only empathetic with their young.

Empathy doesn't make money, blood does.

Mothers need to do better teaching our son's that emotions are good and encourage the expression of kindness, love, and compassion ❤❤❤❤

I'm a good young man, I desire to be a good man.

Toxic masculinity

I was hopeful this Talk would expose some of society's core issues with Masculinity and "Manhood". Unfortunately, there was no real substance. The very fact the Talk ends with comments about "gender equality" underscores this conversation was not about men and for men. This talk was about men for women.

TRUMP and TRUMPISM? What can we do, right now, to wake up VOTERS?
Perhaps, we can ASK TRUMPSTERS and TRUMP, himself to wake up, now?
SOUND a WARNING, over and over, again, while there is still time to save America!
========================================================== TNX MCH

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Society today doesn't put a spotlight on good male role models, and so boys and young men don't know what it is to be a good man. Taking responsibility, being strong for others, cooperating (moreso than competing, although competition is important), nurturing and protecting - these things make for strong and healthy men, and should absolutely be something we collectively define as masculine.