Emotional Dysregulation: What It Is, How to Stop It

I don't even think you realized what you recorded. I listened and listened again. This video is amazing. It has opened wounds of CPTSD. I DIDNT Even KNOW I HAD. thank you so so much

I have shame of overreaction... and I thank you for your knowledge, I think it will help me...

My problem is that I don’t know how to feel my feelings. Could you or have you made a video about that yet?

Thank you.

I feel it’s important to state that this is one persons opinion based on their lived experience…Not saying that makes this message less valid but not absolute truth.

My girlfriend and I split up due to my issues and insecurities I often project them on others… I have a really hard time dealing with abandonment issues… I think people are going to leave me alone a lot… looking back at my childhood I understand now why… my parents gave me away at birth to my grandparents and they both worked a lot so they would send me to the cheapest babysitters they could afford… where I would get bullied and the sitters kids often would do things to get me in trouble and I would get hit and punished for it… some times I would get hit so bad I would pee and poop in my pants… and the yelling and screaming at me from them still gets to me today some times when I think about it I shudder to this day… so I feel like people are going to leave me a lot and sometimes for good… I feel like people need to be around me so I can keep them safe… I’m very overwhelming with feelings especially love… I can often be to loving and overly sensitive… the good news is my girlfriend and I might be apart but she’s still here for me I chose to seek help on my own and I’ve always been scared to talk about things out of fear of being laughed at and picked on… but I really don’t want to lose my girlfriend she’s the only person that didn’t push me away because of my issues and wants to encourage and help be a supportive partner while I’m working on healing from my traumas… I’m not violent or abusive and I hate yelling or screaming… I’m just really clingy and over protective… if a hour goes by after I text or call someone and they don’t answer I think they are going to abandoned me and I shut myself in and get depressed… and want to hide from the world…

Thank you SO much. I've been trying to find help on this matter for a long time. And you totally hit those points for me. At last I have some tools tovhelp me, especially with the crying. I can't thank you enough xxx

So glad I came across these videos

Yes yes thank you

Thing is, I can't stay much longer without a job

Perfect 👌 ❤

Thank you! So much pressure to feel when being in control is what I really need.

Say Jesus' name, so calming for me..then pray for perspective and peace...what's more important than shining your light for Jesus?<3

You are literally saving my life. Thank you ❤

This content serves as a powerful mentor. Reading a book with related messages impacted me profoundly. "The Art of Meaningful Relationships in the 21st Century" by Leo Flint

I’m about to use all these tips in my smoking cessation journey. Thank u so much for this video

What if annoying sounds (grass mowing, machinery, dog barking, etc) are my triggers?

Aww right aww okay.... 😮

Why can't you people just tell me how to turn off the feelings? I dont want to have to talk to myself like a stupid robot, I want to not have the overwhelming feelings in the first place, like everyone else!!!

I'm late to the game on this but; my issue with dialing down an overreaction to someone saying or doing something crass harsh, terrible, etc , makes me feel like if I DON'T react or overreact, then they cannot see the magnitude of hurt they caused, or they may feel they can continue saying or doing whatever it is because I didn't react. I certainly need assistance in this area which is why I'm here.

in addition tough by doing all this but still would you agree that it is better to feel than surpress? but maybe feel it alone and be aware of why you are feeling what and trying in this moment to analyze

Thank you for these videos. They help a lot.

I’m a wreck. Thanks for your content

umhuh!!!!!

👏🙌👏❤️

This is all true but the key is to see emotions from a bigger perspective which often isn't available in the moment despite these techniques. So I gradually get used to grounding myself in a more loving path of devotion which allows me to disengage from emotions more easily.

what advice would you give when in a state of anger, you wanna let it out because holding back will create thoughts of "not being allowed to speak up/express your emotions" as a result of childhood c-ptsd?

it's like the struggle between holding back and expressing IS the trigger. You want to express yourself so badly because you wanna be heard and you don't want to submit/succumb to anyone, after that trauma experience

This video has been a total game changer for me because it explains something that happens to me that I couldn't make sense of before. I must admit though, rather than thinking of stopping a plane taking off (because planes are supposed to take off and it's entirely appropriate that they do) I find the statement
" I'm having an emotional reaction" is like defusing the emotional bomb that's about to explode. This, combined with the daily practice is a life saver because you can bet that all the destructive stuff that explodes outwards during an episode of emotional dysregulation is based of fears and resentments that haven't been brought to light by us. I laughed when you said that the more urgent it feels to say something during a deregulated state, the more likely it is that it's best not to say it there and then!
Thank you Anna for such wonderful resources 🙏

It never stops for me though, it never stops. I’m constantly disregulated and never “calm”.

This is so true…it is difficult to get ahead of the dysregulation…it’s taken me months and months to get to a place where I can handle these feelings.

It is a WONDERFUL practice i live to hold back from responding to a text when i feel dis regulated.

Note to self : say im feeling dis regulated ". 😮
😼👍✅️

" im having an emotional reaction " 🤔 when have strong feelings.

The title is the opposite of my best therapist said . 😮😕🤔

this is crappy advice!!!!

love is a feeling and feeling is healing!

30 minutes is not enough
It sometimes takes ages.

And the thoughts will remain the same, even though I dont react to it.

I have been looking for how to self regulate emotions and your video was the most clear, while a lot of people says pause, .. pause and what? Love you said, writing helps, exercise helps, postpone the conversation helps, till the feeling gets regulated and you can have a conversation from loving perspective instead of anger or bitter one. Thank you sooo much!!

Thank you Anna. I´m using your technique since several months ago and it´s helping me so much! And so do your videos, your tips have upleveled my toolbox. Thanks again.

Excellent video breaking down into components the stages of reaction that aid with awareness towards regulation. I have noticed a frustration, especially amongst those, including myself, who are authentically learning to feel again. We're not quite sure what to do with the feeling, and don't have the self-care in place that allows us to hang it on the line for a while. Holding onto an emotion like that feels horrific. It doesn't feel safe to express it either and there's a sort of guilt that comes along with even having the feeling, because we are thinking about ourselves. Then there is an anger following the guilt. Could you say something more to those of us who are struggling with safe expression after freezing rather than the outburst-style of dysregulation?

I have to say this was a the last piece of my puzzle to finally finding peace after a journey i started 20 years ago. I started getting interested in psychology after years of abuse by my narc mom. I had many wounds but emotional disregulation was the worst wound i had in terms of pure destruction of my life and relqtionships. Thank you i can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel

I need to learn to do this but I spiral when I am being ignored

I have CPTSD around money independence. Confusion with everything and undiagnosed autism and diagnosed probably bipolar and ADD. It gets worse when I can’t exercise and now I’m dependent on ADD meds. I’m never balanced out and triggers are days when I can’t do anything when I have to talk to people that used to help me and it’s just not working anymore, it hurts so bad when I can’t exercise I have to stuff my face with food like stuff it to the point that I’m in pain because I can’t go to the gym tired of wandering around aimlessly in stores money to pull in my car to drive around I can’t meditate immediately about feeling at peace but it’s not just about immediate. I don’t know what to do. He say something Baskin happen I really need help and no one’s helping me and I can’t help myself anymore.

❤❤

I really wish I could trust therapists or counselors at this point. Had a court-ordered therapist fall asleep while I was speaking with him in session. Multiple times just to have the social worker tell me that "I put him into a trance". Best part I only got a half apology and he still never accepted responsibility his actions had on me. Good old CPS gaslighting children

I have ptsd and I've found there is a difference between retreating and feeling the trigger and projecting it on someone else. I've found dealing with the trigger myself without projecting the emotion onto someone else which as you said amplifies the trigger and keeps it going. But when I retreat and let my feelings flow on my own it helps me recognise the trigger and understand my feelings and has helped me to have more intimacy with myself as when I retreat I put myself and my healing first it builds self confidence. I retreat, understand my feelings from letting them flow, then when I am calm I know what to tell others about how I feel and what I can and cant be around. Calm brings clarity and I found its been part of my healing to calm on my own. Hope this helps ❤.

What can I do if someone just isn't letting it go? I know saying "it doesn't matter" isn't the best way to say I can't/don't want to talk about it, but my coworker kept saying "you weren't like this a minute ago" or insisting I tell them what's wrong. What can I say or do that will help both her understand and me not blow up?

Thank you 🙏

Dude what the hell am I supposed to do my airplane has been in the air for forty years and I have to refuel up there and I'm having I'm keeping and study

Thank you.